Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
I gave my friend who is a blonde a bumper sticker that read, “There is no such thing as a dumb blonde!” A few hours after leaving her house, she called me and asked if I had another bumper sticker. I told her no, but asked why she needed another one. She explained to me that she was going to put the bumper sticker upside down as a joke, but instead she accidentally put it right side up. I guess…
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When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American Ambassador to France threw a gala dinner party at the Embassy in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador’s wife was chatting with Madame deGaulle. “Madame,” she began, “Your husband has been such a prominent figure in the world for so long, first as a great General, then as President of the Republic, now as a statesman, what are you most looking forward to in your retirement years?”…
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can never get most of the people to vote any of the time!!!
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Bob and Larry were out chopping wood one day. As they were chopping, Bob slipped and cut off his arm. Picking it up and placing it in a bag, Bob and Larry went to the Doctor. The Doctor looked at the situation and stated, “This should not be a problem. Reatatching an arm is easy. Larry come back in an hour.” So Larry left too chop some more wood. Thirty minutes later he went back to the Doctor, who told…
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Two youngsters were closely examining bathroom scales on display at the department store. “What’s it for?” one asked. “I don’t know,” the other replied. “I think you stand on it, and it makes you mad…at least it does that for my Mom and Dad.”
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These three guys were walking along the beach, chatting it up, when they hear calls for help from two young women caught in the riptide. The first guy comes running up, screaming “I’ll save you!” He jumps in the water, swims out, and comes back with one arm missing. His friends look stunned, so he explains, “Sharks.” The second guy, feeling superior, says, “I’ll go save them!” and jumps in. He comes back and he’s missing a leg. Before either…
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During the 1957 World Series, Yankee catcher Yogi Berra noticed that Hank Aaron grasped the bat the wrong way. “Turn it around,” Berra said, “so you can see the trademark.” But Aaron kept his eye on the pitcher’s mound: “Didn’t come up here to read. Came up here to hit.”
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Airplanes and women: A comparison 1. An airplane will kill you quickly-a woman takes her time. 2. Airplanes like to do it inverted. 3. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch. 4. An airplanes thrust to weight is higher. 5. An airplane dosn’t get mad if you “touch and go”. 6. An airplane does not object to a preflight inspection. 7. Airplanes come with manuals. 8. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits. 9. You can…
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An elderly man goes into confession and says to the priest, “Father, I’m 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren. I started taking this new Viagra pill, and last night I had an affair and made love to two 18-year-old girls. Both of them. Twice.” The priest said: “Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?” “Never Father, I’m Jewish.” “So then, why are you telling me?” responded the priest. “Hell! I’m telling…
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This is a story we know real well About a young hooker named Snookery Smell. Ever since she was twenty the men always knew, Where to find a cheap trick or a Snookery screw. They came night and day to her house in wazoo, For the wonderful feeling of a boping bam boo. She could move up and down with the greatest of ease, And she spent lots of time turning tricks on her knees. But in twenty years time…
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