Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A guy is nagged by his wife, who is ardently supported by his mother-in-law. They ask him for a vacation, so he goes around shopping for the cheapest offer. The salesman offers him a vacation for two to New Zealand with two confirmed Silk Air flights, free breakfast, Bungee jumping- No strings attached. The man asked the salesman if he could forgo other benefits for extra bungee jumping with no strings attached.
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Martin Van Buren was so obnoxious to the southern states that he received only 9 popular votes from the South during his 1848 campaign for the Presidency—all were from Virginia. His supporters raised a cry of fraud. “Yes, fraud,” said a Virginian, “and we’re still looking for the son-of-a-bitch who voted nine times.”
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A woman from the deepest, most southern part of Alabama goes into the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently deceased husband is written. The obit editor informs her that the fee for the obituary is 50 cents a word. She pauses, reflects and then says, “Well then, let it read, ‘Billy Bob died.” Amused at the woman’s thrift, the editor says, “Sorry ma’am there is a 7 word minimum on all obituaries.” Only a little…
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A man is out drinking with his buddies one night and suddenly realizes he has stayed too late and is in for trouble when he gets home. “No problem,” says his friend, “Do what I do to my wife. Sneak into the bedroom, crawl up under the blanket between her legs and do a little oral sex! She’ll forget all about being mad and fall right asleep.” So the guy gets home to a dark, quiet house. He creeps in…
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How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don’t know, because it has never happened. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good looking? They all already have boyfriends.
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Two morons were working in a pit, digging away, while their boss was up on normal ground, sitting next to his cadillac, drinking lemonade. One moron said, “Why do we have to be down here, while our boss is up there relaxing?” The other replied, “I don’t know, I’ll go up and ask him”, which he did. The boss replied, “It’s because I’m smart and you guys are morons”. “What makes you think that?”, asked the moron. “Let me show…
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10. Yes, of course the water is purified. 9. I don’t usually drink this much. 8. I’ll be right back with your change. 7. None of my silver is plated. 6. I’ll ask my manager. 5. No hablo ingles. 4. My dad owns this place. 3. Really, the free breakfast has nothing to do with time share. 2. I’m divorced, I just wear the ring for my kids. 1. Just one more drink and we’ll go home!!
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It was way past midnight and a man was robbing a house. Just then he hears this voice say, “Jesus is gonna get you!” The robber thinks nothing of it and begins to take the T.V. when he hears the voice again: “Jesus is gonna get you!” The robber discovers that the noise is from a parrot, so he walks up to the parrot and says, “What’s your name, little guy?” The parrot replies, “Moses”. The robber says, “What kind…
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A cowboy was walking down the street with his new pet dachshund. The passerby asked him why a cowboy would own that kind of dog. The cowboy answered, “Well, somebody told me to get along little doggie.”
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A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered, with his thumb over the meat. “Are you CRAZY?!” yelled the customer. “Don’t bring my meal with your hand on my steak!” “What!” answers the waiter. “You want it to fall on the floor again?”
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