Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A wife is going through her husband’s closet one day when she finds a metal box. Inside the box she finds 3 golf balls and $20,000. She immediately goes downstairs and confronts him with it. Wife: “What is this box for?” Husband: “Well, every time we had bad sex I put a golf ball in the box.” The wife thought this was pretty good seeing as how they had been married for 20 years. Wife: “What is the $20,000 for?”…
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The Bureau For At-Risk Youth of Plainview, N.Y., has recalled an “anti-drug” pencil it was giving to local school children. The pencils have the slogan “Too Cool to Do Drugs” on them, but as the pencils are sharpened down, the message becomes “Cool to Do Drugs” and, later, “Do Drugs”. When shown the unintended message, a spokesperson for the Bureau noted the group was “actually a little embarrassed that we didn’t notice that sooner.” The pencils will be redone with…
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Oh my my, I played the Pennsylvania lottery on Wednesday and knew what the winning numbers were going to be but got confused and punched in the wrong ones. Now the lottery commission is telling me it’s too late. Oh my, what am I going to do! Jessie Jackson where are you when I need you most? Maybe I’ll get a good lawyer. The jackpot was 30 million dollars and it should have been mine. It’s just not fair…
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This story occurred on Melbourne radio. One of the FM stations had a competition where they ring someone up, ask them three personal questions, ring their spouse or partner, ask them the same three questions, if the answers are the same, the couple win a holiday to Bali. The competition went like this: Presenter: Gidday its XXX-FM, do you want to play the game ? Brian: Yeah, sure. Presenter: O.K., Question 1 – When was the last time you had…
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1. American Express calls and says: “Leave home without it!” 2. You’re formulating a plan to rob the food bank. 3. You’ve rolled so many pennies, you’ve formed a psychic bond with Abe Lincoln. 4. Long distance companies don’t call you to switch anymore. 5. You finally clean your house, hoping to find change. 6. Your bologna has no first name. 7. Sally Struther’s sends you food. 8. McDonald’s supplies you with all your kitchen condiments. 9. You give blood…
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ATTRACTION The act of associating horniness with a particular person. DATING The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future. EASY A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man. EYE CONTACT A method utilized by a woman to communicate to a man that she is interested…
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In case your frustration level rises today, this is for everyone who occasionally has a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone: I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a telephone call that I had to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, “Hello?” I politely said, “This is Patrick Hanifin and may I please speak to Robin Carter?” Suddenly the phone was slammed down on…
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Three blondes have died and went up to talk to St. Peter. St. Peter says,”You can’t enter these pearly gates unless you answer my question correctly. What is Easter?” The first blonde says, “It’s that holiday in October when you thank people and stuff.” St. Peter is a little annoyed by this answer and sends her to Hell. The second one says,” It’s that holiday in February when you have that big tree and stuff.” St. Peter was really annoyed…
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Two gays were sitting on the edge of the bed, one turns to the other…”YOU the man!” Second gay responds, “NO, You the MAN.” First gay says, “No, No, you don’t understand, You are THE man!”
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Three older ladies were discussing the travails of getting older. One said,”Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand in front of the refrigerator and can`t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich.” The second lady chimed in, “Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can`t remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down.” The third one responded, “Well, I`m…
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