Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
It’s a sunny morning in the Big Forest and the Bear family is just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty! “Who’s been eating my porridge?” he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty! “Who’s been eating my porridge?” he roars. Mummy Bear puts her head through…
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Morris is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker, Joe, is wearing an earring. Morris knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in “fashion sense.” “Hey Joe,” Morris yells out, “I didn’t know you were into earrings.” “Don’t make such a big deal out of it…it’s only an earring,” says Joe sheepishly. “No really,” probes Morris, “How long have you been wearing one?” “Ever since my wife found…
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God and St. Peter go down to the golf course on a nice Sunday afternoon. As they go to tee-off, God motions for Peter to start. Peter’s a bit surprised, but he sets up and takes his shot. He hits a nice drive right onto the green. When God takes his shot, however, he doesn’t get nearly as nice a drive. A sharp hook takes the ball right into the rough. Peter asks God “What happened?” God just smiles as…
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A man goes to hell and shows up in front of three doors. The devil pops up and says, “You have a choice here behind these doors for what you want to do for eternity.” The man thinks this is fair and looks behind the first door and sees many people on a hot metal floor, standing on their heads and screaming. He quickly slams the door saying,”NOT THAT!” The man looks behind the second and sees many people standing…
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A troupe of traveling actors had taken the long bus ride from Pittsburgh to Detroit where they were scheduled to perform Hamlet that night. Derek Drake, the handsome leading man, must have been sitting in a draft because when they arrived in Detroit just six hours before the Sunday night performance, he had a scratchy throat and laryngitis. Tracy Towers, the troupe’s leading lady, frantically began phoning doctors listed in the yellow pages, but all she got were answering machines.…
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Here’s a little tip from an experienced traveler. A wake-up call is the worst way to wake up. The phone rings; it’s so loud; you can’t turn it down. So leave the number of the room next to you. Then you’ll hear a muffled ring, and you hear a guy yell, “What are you calling ME for?” Then you get up and take a shower. It’s great!
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A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, “PULLOVER!” “NO,” the blonde yelled back, “IT’S A SCARF!” ++++++++++ The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something…
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A man needs to get an artificial eye due to a work injury. The eye doctor shows him a glass eye and a wooden eye. He can only afford the wooden eye so he buys it. He is embarassed to have a wooden eye and doesn’t socialize. He hears of a handicap dance and desides that he would risk going, thinking that no one would make fun of him at the dance since they have disabilities too. When he gets…
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“Ok, now who can recite the alphabet for the class?” asked Johnny’s teacher. “Raise your hand if you would like to try”. Johnny raised his hand, yelling, “Teacher, teacher! I have to pee!” “Ok Johnny, recite your alphabet, then you can go. Well, not wanting to be rude to the teacher, Johnny started slowly. “Stand up when you speak,” said the teacher. He stood up, crossing his legs. “ABCDEFG… um.. HIJK… hmmm… LMNO…. ummm..QRSTUVWXYZ” “Very good,” said the teacher, “but…
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Alex, Roy and David escape a burning building by climbing to the roof. Firemen are on the street below, holding a blanket for them to jump in. The firemen yell to Alex, ?Jump! Jump! It?s your only chance to survive!? Alex jumps and SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away. The fireman laugh as he slams into the pavement like a tomato. ?C?mon! Jump! You gotta jump!? say the firemen to Roy. ?Oh no! You?re gonna pull the blanket away!?…
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