Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy scout and a pastor were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers that they had better jump, and bailed out. Unfortunately there were only three parachutes remaining. The doctor grabbed one and said “I’m a doctor, I save…
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By the time the sailor pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. “You’ve got to have a room somewhere,” he pleaded, “or just a bed, I don’t care where.” “Well, I do have a double room with one occupant – an Air Force guy,” admitted the manager, “and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I’m…
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The newspaper article reads: Police were called to the scene of a museum robbery where a masked bandit stole priceless works of art. The suspect was apprehended just 2 blocks away. When he was questioned by police they asked how could someone break through the security system with such ease and be caught just 2 blocks away. The suspect simply replied….”I had no ‘Monet’ for gas to make the ‘Van-Gogh’…….”
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You know in this world there are three kinds of people: People that can count and people that can’t.
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A employee was playing golf with his boss for a large bet, and had been waiting for a number of weeks for the game. He set himself up on the first tee and then on the nearby road a funeral went past, and so he took his hat off and bowed his head. His boss was suprised that his employee showed such a Christian side to himself especially as he was playing for a large bet. “That was kind of…
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It was the first day after Christmas vacation and the teacher was asking the kids, “What did you get for Christmas?” The first kid she asked said “I got a doll and a tape player.” The teacher asked the next boy what he got for Christmas. He answered, “A soccer ball and a t-shirt” The next boy answered, “A puppy and a little red wagon.” The teacher wanted to go to the next kid but the boy started telling a…
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A guy calls home from work and a strange woman answers the phone. The guy says,”Who is this?” “This is the maid,” answers the woman. “We don’t have a maid!” “I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house.” “Oh. Well, this is her husband. Is she there?” “Ummm…she’s upstairs in the bedroom with someone whom I just naturally figured was her husband.” He’d always suspected, but now he knows. He says to the maid, “Listen, would…
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My son, Kenny, a kindergartner, practices spelling with magnetic letters on the refrigerator: cat, dog, dad, and mom have been proudly displayed for all to see. One morning, while getting ready for the day, Kenny bounded into the room with his arms outstretched. In his hands were three magnetic letters: G-O-D. “Look what I spelled, Mom!” Kenny exclaimed, a proud smile on his face. “That’s wonderful!” I praised him. “Now go put them on the fridge so Daddy can see…
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” Yeah, whatever..” ” It’s your stomach..” ” Would you like that cooked?”.. ” How much salt is TOO much?..” ” If your order is hot, then consider it a gift..” ” You don’t actually think I’m listening, do you?”.. ” Don’t mind the open sore on my lip when you get to the window”.. ” I’m just getting over Hepatitus”.. ” I have to pee, can you hold on a minute?..
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…. AnD dRiVe OtHeR PeOpLe iNsAnE: At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Page yourself over the intercom. (Don’t disguise your voice.) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them…
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