Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
JO BOB: Hey man, did you hear about Oprah Winfrey? JON BOY: No I didn’t Jo JO BOB: Yah, she got busted for cocaine last week. JON BOY: No Way! JO BOB: Yep, she was at the Airport last week and the inspecting guard lifted up her dress. There it was, 50 pounds of CRACK !!
(2)
Loading...
One day the sheriff sees Billy Bob walking around town with nothing on except his boots. The sheriff asks, “Billy Bob, what the hell are you doing walking around town undressed like that?” Billy Bob replies, “Well Sheriff, me and Mary Lou was down on the farm and we started a-cuddlin’. Mary Lou said we should go in the barn and we did. Inside the barn we started a-kissing and a-cuddlin’ and things got pretty hot and heavy. Well then…
(0)Loading...
I, the undersigned, a female accepting a marriage proposal, agree that… Section 1. In the unlikely event of my not having an orgasm after you’ve drunkenly rolled on top of me and pumped away for five *whole* minutes, wheezing like an old man with emphysema, I shall politely fake one. Section 1.01 And it’ll be a really good act too, with me saying stuff like “So THIS is what hot monkey love is all about!” and howling like a cat…
(1)Loading...
A magazine recently ran a “Dilbert quotes” contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes from their real life Dilbert-type managers. Here are some of the submittals. 1. As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two weeks. 2. What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will encounter. 3. E-mail is not to be…
(0)Loading...
“I know that smart-alec Tex,” said the first cowboy. “He’s going to start bragging about that new car he bought as soon as he gets here.” “Not Tex,” said the second guy. “He’ll always just be a good ol’ boy. When he walks in, I’m sure all he’ll says is ‘hello.’” “I know Tex better than either of you,” said the third man. “He’s so smart, he’ll figure out a way to do both. Here he comes now….” Tex swung…
(0)Loading...
The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, “What kinds of ice cream do you have?” “Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry,” the girl wheezed as she spoke, patted her chest and seemed unable to continue. “You got laryngitis?” the young man asked, sympathetically. “Nope.” she whispered, “Just vanilla, chocolate and strawberry.”
(1)Loading...
The last four U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado, and off they spin to OZ. After threatening trials and tribulations, they finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the Great Wizard. “WHAT BRINGS YOU BEFORE THE GREAT WIZARD? WHAT DO YOU WANT?” Jimmy Carter steps forward timidly: “I had a terrible time with Iran, so I’ve come for some courage.” “No problem” says the Wizard, “WHO IS NEXT?” Ronald Reagan steps forward, “Well.. Well.. Well.. I…
(0)Loading...
When you’re feeling so important And your ego is in bloom When you simply take for granted You’re the wisest in the room When you feel your very absence Would leave a great big hole, Just follow these instructions They will humble any soul. Take a bucket filled with water Put your hand in to the wrist, Pull it out, the hole remaining Is how much you will be missed. Splash wildly when you enter, Stir a lot and splash…
(0)Loading...
I stopped at a fast-food restaurant recently. I was fascinated by a sign which offered Fat-Free French Fries. I decided to give them a try. I was dismayed when the clerk pulled a basket of fries from the fryer, which was dripping with fat. He filled a bag with these fries and put them in my order. “Just a minute!” I said. “Those aren’t fat-free.” “Yes, they are. We only charge for the potatoes . . . the fat is…
(1)Loading...
St. Peter greeted two newcomers at the Pearly Gates. One was a pope; the other was a lawyer. He ushered The Pope to a small shack and settled him in to his austere quarters; then led the lawyer to a huge, luxuriously appointed mansion. “I don’t understand,” the lawyer puzzled. “That man was a Pope, and you gave him a shack. And yet, you’ve said I am to live in this luxurious, huge mansion. Why?” “Sir,” said St. Peter. “We’ve…
(1)Loading...