Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Clinton walked into a press conference with a pair of white lacy panties under his pit. Gore asked, “Clinton,why do you have a pair of white lacy underwear under your pit?” Clinton said, “It is a patch. I am tring to quit.”
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The new priest is a little nervous about hearing the confessions, but the older priest encourages him to give it a try. The new priest listens to a few, and then the older priest pulls him out of the confessional, saying, “Why don’t you try to do this, cross your arms, rub your chin, and say things like ‘Yes, I see’ and ‘Go on, my child.’” The new priest does this. then the older priest says to him, “Now, don’t…
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Joe, a small young businessman was having a conversation with a large construction worker. It was about what would they would do if an atomic war had been declared and they only had twenty minutes to live. The construction worker said that he would fuck anything that moved. He then asked Joe what he would do. Joe replied, “I would stand perfectly still.”
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While we believe we will be fully Y2K compliant by January 1, 2000, and most of our subsidiary units and contractors claim they will also be fully compliant, we obviously need to make some preparations in case unexpected challenges impair our ability to meet the needs of our customers. Enclosed with this memo is a “Y2K Backup System” device designed to meet short time emergency needs in case of a computer operations failure, or operational delay. This device is the…
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A big, burly man visited the pastor’s home and asked to see the minister’s wife, a woman well known for her charitable impulses. “Madam,” he said in a broken voice, “I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this district. The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work, and the nine children are starving. They are about to be turned into the cold, empty streets unless someone pays their rent,…
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A search and rescue team had been assembled and sent on a mission to find an airplane that had crashed on top of a mountain. It was their duty to rescue any survivors. After finally reaching the top of the mountain, they came upon the crash site. At the site, one lone survivor sat with his back against a tree, chewing on a bone. As he tossed the bone onto a huge pile of there bones, he noticed the rescue…
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Three midgets went to the world guniess book of records to be entered for the smallest extremities. The first midget for his hands. Upon exiting he exclaimed, “I’m in!” The second midget went for the size of his feet. Upon exiting he exclaimed, “I’m in!”. The third midget went for the size of his penis. Upon exiting he exclaimed, “Who the damn hell is Bill Clinton?”
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A shapely lady in a bikini walked into the ocean to take a swim. A large wave came up and washed over her, tearing off her bikini top. She came out of the surf with her arms folded across her chest. A little boy playing in the sand looked up at her and said, “Lady, if you’re going to drown those puppies, I’ll take the one with the brown nose.”
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Tech Support calls “YOU” for help. When you are reading something printed, you wish you could use a search function to get to the point. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say “LOL.” When you reply to someone verbally, your fingers start typing your response. You check your e-mail over and over, even when you know there’s nothing there. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on. You have called out someone’s screen name while making…
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Two Kiwi’s are working on a building site in Auckland. Phul (Phil) & Muck (Mick). Anyway Phul turns to Muck & says, “Cawww I’ve gotta take a piss, but there’s nowhere to go, eh.” “Walk out to the ind of thit plank,” replies Muck. “I’ll stand on this ind & balance ut.” “Are you sure, Muck?” “Yis, no worries” “100%?” “YIS!” So out goes Phul to take a piss & the lunch siren sounds, Muck forgets what he’s supposed to…
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