Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
It was supposed to be a happy time, but it wasn’t. Santa was really angry. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the Christmas cookies. The Elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had put in while making toys, and the reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. They had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and crashed it into a…
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Two long-time golfing buddies got to the course one day and decided that this day they would play the ball where it lies…”No matter what!!” On the 14th hole, one of them sliced his drive, and it ended up on the concrete cart path. As he reached down to pick up his ball to get relief, his friend said, “Wait a minute! We agreed that we would not improve our lies, remember? No matter what!” The first player tried to…
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There was a woman doing a report on Native Americans. The topic was going to be about the feathers that they wear. She went to the village and started looking around and decided to start with an Indian with just one feather in his headdress. “Excuse me sir, but why do you have one feather in your headdress?” asked the reporter. “Me Brave, me screw one squaw,” replied the Indian. A little discouraged the lady went to an Indian with…
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A team of archaeologists were working when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A dog 2. A donkey 3. A shovel 4. A fish 5. A Star of David They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least more than three thousand years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists…
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A minister was opening his mail one morning. Drawing a single sheet of paper from an envelope, he found written on it only one word, “FOOL.” The next Sunday, he announced, “I have known many people who have written letters and forgot to sign their names. “But this week, for the first time, I received a letter from someone who signed his name and forgot to write the letter.”
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Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town’s morals recently accused George, a local man, of being an alcoholic because she saw his pickup truck parked outside the town’s only bar. George stared at her for a moment, and said nothing. Later that evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left it there all night.
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Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying: “DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!” posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register. He asked the store manager, “Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” “Yep, that’s him,” he replied. The stranger couldn’t help but be amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you…
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Teacher: Little Johnny, go to the map and find North America. Little Johnny: Here it is! Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? Class: Little Johnny! —- Teacher: Are you chewing gum? Little Johnny: No, I’m Little Johnny. —- Teacher: How can one person make so many stupid mistakes in one day? Little Johnny: I get up early. —- Teacher; Didn’t you promise to behave? Little Johnny: Yes, sir. Teacher: And didn’t I promise to punish you if you didn’t?…
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My 11 year old daughter and I were getting dressed in the bathroom the other morning. Being an avid gymnast, she hasn’t quite started to develop yet. As I was putting on my bra, she said, “Mom you need a bra to hold up your boobies, but I don’t.” I laughed and said, “Not yet you don’t.” She said, “No, but I got eye-bras to hold up my eyes though!” I laughed hysterically. This is a true story.
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A cowboy was riding the range and as he rounded a bend in the road, his horse balked at a huge rattlesnake in the road. As he drew his colt and was ready to shoot, the snake yelled, “Stop..I am a charmed snake and if you don’t shoot me I’ll grant you three wishes.” Somewhat shaken, he holstered his revolver and said, “OK, let’s see what you can do”. The cowboy said, “I’ve been working really hard all my life,…
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