Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Help! My dog has been missing, here is a brief description: Has fleas, mange and really bad breath; Runs on 3 legs (lawnmower accident) Blind in one eye (bowhunting accident) Cropped tail Recently castrated Answers to the name of “Lucky”
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Just recently I was honored to be selected as an Outstanding Famous Celebrity in my community to be a judge at a chili cookoff because no one else wanted to do it. Also, the original person called in sick at the last minute and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy,…
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Grandma walks into the laundry where she sees gramps with one hand pulling “Mr.Johnson” right out straight on the ironing board. In his other hand he has a can and is spraying that “one eyed wonder worm” for all it is worth. Grandma screams, “Just what the hell do you think you are doing with my starch?” “It’s ok, hon,” says gramps, “I heard on TV to keep it hard I should use Niagara.” Granny just sighed and shook her…
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Just recently I was honored to be selected as an Outstanding Famous Celebrity in my community to be a judge at a chili cookoff because no one else wanted to do it. Also, the original person called in sick at the last minute and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy,…
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1. Smoke jimson weed. Do whatever comes naturally. 2. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class. 3. Twitch a lot. 4. Pretend to talk while pretending to be asleep. 5. Steal a fishtank. Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it. Talk to them. 6. Become a subgenius. 7. Inject his/her twinkies with a mixture of Dexatrim and MSG. 8. Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat.…
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A farmer had 250 hens he wanted to mate, but his rooster was old and he needed a new one. He went to see his neighbor, and after some haggling over the price, which he thought was too high, he took home a young rooster. When he got back to the farm, he told the rooster that he could take his time, because he had no competition, and he should enjoy himself. He turned him loose in the hen house…
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British Museum’s Not-So-Original Problem Inspires ‘Provocative’ Prize-Winning Tale About a Replica. Piyumi Kapugeekiyana’s literary triumph dives deep into the thorny issues of repatriation and cultural ownership, but here’s the kicker: it’s all told through the eyes of a replica of the goddess T?r?. ? Talk about meta-commentary! The winning story’s title, ‘The Original Is Not Here,’ pretty much sums up the entire debate in one perfectly cheeky phrase. ? It seems even fictional statues are getting in on the act…
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Bingo! Tyneside Hall Swaps Number Calls for Bass Drops as It Becomes Unexpected Rave Hotspot. Who knew that the pursuit of “full house” could evolve into an entirely different kind of pursuit involving flashing lights and thumping bass? ? In a plot twist no one saw coming, the King Street Social Club in North Shields, once a bastion of hushed numbers and dabbers, has undergone a radical transformation. Forget your grandma’s weekly outing; it’s now a bonafide mecca for ravers!…
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An optometrist operates on a hippie painter’s girlfriend and saves her eyesight. The hippie painter is so grateful that he goes to the doctor’s house one day, while the doctor has office hours, goes inside and paints a huge eye on an entire wall of the living room, leaving the fireplace as the pupil of the eye. He’s just finishing up when the doctor walks in. He says to the doctor, “Well, do you like it man?” The doctor says,…
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