Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A wealthy businessman, who was a notorious cheater when playing his beloved sport of golf, died and went straight to Hell. When he got to Hell, he was surprised to find himself on a golf course with well-manicured greens and the weather so perfectly cool and clear that it did not seem like Hell at all. At the first tee, he was greeted by Satan himself who gave him a complete set of golf clubs made of gold in a…
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Two privates stationed at Fort Ord were handed shovels and told to bury a large dead animal. While digging they got into an argument about what they were burying. “This here’s a big mule!” “This ain’t no mule, this here’s a donkey.” “Mule!” “Donkey!” Well, this went on for a while until the camp chaplain came by. “What are you boys doing?” “We’re diggin’ a grave for this mule.” “Donkey, dammit!” The chaplain cut in, “Boys, this isn’t either one,…
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TO IMPRESS A WOMAN: Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, tease her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, buy things for her, listen to her, care for her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her TO IMPRESS A MAN: Show up naked. Bring beer.
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One afternoon, a woman is getting on a bus with her newborn baby. The bus driver looks at the lady and replies, “Damn, Woman, that’s the ugliest baby I have ever seen in my entire life!!!” The woman, somewhat distraught, proceeds to the back of the bus, where she is questioned by a fellow rider. “Why do you look so down?” asked the man. The woman begins to tell the man about the bus driver and the rude comment he…
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This mangy-lookin’ guy goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bar-tender says “No way. I don’t think you can pay for it.” The guy says “You’re right. I don’t have any money, but if I show you something you haven’t seen before, will you give me a drink?” The bartender says “Only if what you show me ain’t risque.” “Deal!” says the guy, as he reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the…
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A group of American tourists were being guided through an ancient castle in Europe. “This place” the guide told them, “is 600 years old. Not a stone in it has been touched, nothing altered, nothing replaced in all those years.” “Wow!” said one woman, dryly. “They must have the same landlord I have.”
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One thing that has always bugged me is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating as they were to me. The call was from AT&T and it went something like this: Me: Hello? AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T… Me: Is this AT&T? AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T… Me: This is AT&T? AT&T: Yes This is AT&T… Me:…
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There was once a great actor who had a problem. He could no longer remember his lines. Finally, after many years, he finds a theatre where they are prepared to give him a chance to shine again. The director says, “This is the most important part, and it has only one line. You must walk on the stage carrying a rose. Hold the rose with just one finger and your thumb to your nose. Sniff the rose deeply and then…
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Ole, Lena and Sven were lost in the woods of Northern Minnesota and were becoming desperate, having run out of food several days ago. It was winter, the snow was deep, their situation was looking very bleak. When Ole dug down into the snow to look for nuts, he found an oil lamp and upon rubbing it to get the snow off, a genie came out. The genie says, “I am da great genie of Nordern Minnesooota and I can…
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This young man was going golfing one day, but he wasn’t very good. He had been hitting the ball in the rough, the water, and soon a sand trap. By the time he hit the sand trap he was very annoyed. So he stood there swinging at the ball but missing and in the process digging a hole. Soon he hit something hard (not the golf ball). He bent over and dug it up to see what it was. When…
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