Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
If you have to write a ‘letter of recommendation’ for a fired employee, here are a few suggested phrases: -For the chronically absent: A man like him is hard to find. It seemed her career was just taking off. -For the office drunk: I feel his real talent is wasted here. We generally found him loaded with work to do. Every hour with him was a happy hour. -For an employee with no ambition: He could not care less about…
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1. You can achieve a “Runner’s High” by sitting up. 2. You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before… 3. You can see individual air molecules vibrating. 4. You begin to explore the possibility of setting up an I.V. drip solution of espresso. 5. You wonder if brewing is really a necessary step for the consumption of coffee. 6. You believe that if you think hard enough, you can fly. 7.…
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Lesson Number One: A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit noticed the crow, and asked, “Can I sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered, “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral Of The Story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very,…
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Three nuns passed every day through a street that led them from Church to a Reformatory. They noticed a parrot that stood at the entrance of a big residential house. Every time they passed in front of that house, the bird would pronounced three sequential colors. One day, they heard, “yellow, blue, black.” One of the nuns noticed that those colors perfectly matched the colors of their underwear. She mentioned her discovery to the other two nuns, but both were…
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A boy about to get married comes home from his bachelor party. His father is waiting up for him to find out how it went. When the boy walks in and sees his father he says, “Dad, I know you and Mother have spent a lot of money and time on the wedding, but, I can’t marry her!” “Why’s this, son?” the father ask. “Well, tonight I found out she’s still a virgin!” Then the father staggers back a little…
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A visitor from England was running around town yelling, “The meteor is coming! The meteor is coming! Run and hide, NOW!” A police officer stopped him and said, “What the hell are you yelling about?” The British subject explained that he was repeating what he overheard from two other British subjects, both of whom the officer knew. Hearing the explanation, the policeman got very angry. “WHY can’t you folks from England learn to pronounce the letter ‘H’, when you are…
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Moose Hunting Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a foolproof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot the bull. They set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, donned their costume and began to give the moose love call. Before long,…
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There once was a blonde, brunette and a red head. They were all stranded on a deserted island. One day they were all walking along the beach when they came across a lamp. They decided to rub it hoping a genie would appear and grant them three wishes. So they rubbed the lamp and a genie appeared saying to them, “I shall grant you three wishes, but since there are three of you, you can all have one wish each.”…
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Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton meet up in Baghdad for the first round of talks in a new peace process. When Bill sits down, he notices three buttons on the side of Saddam’s chair. They begin talking. After about five minutes Saddam presses the first button. A boxing glove springs out of a box on the desk and punches Clinton in the face. Confused, Clinton carries on talking as Saddam laughs. A few minutes later the second button is pressed.…
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For you ladies (and men so you’re prepared), a little MEN ARE LIKE humor: MEN ARE LIKE… Floor Tiles, if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years. MEN ARE LIKE… Bank Accounts, without a lot of money, they don’t generate much interest. MEN ARE LIKE… Blenders, you need one, but you’re not quite sure why. MEN ARE LIKE… Chocolate Bars, sweet, smooth and they usually head right to your hips. MEN ARE…
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