Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Sing this to the tune of the Beatles’ “Let It Be” : When I find my code in tons of trouble, Friends and colleagues come to me, Speaking words of wisdom: Write in C. As the deadline fast approaches, And bugs are all that I can see, Somewhere, someone whispers: Write in C. Write in C, Write in C, Write in C, oh, Write in C. LOGO’s dead and buried, Write in C. I used to write a lot of…
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The 3rd grade school teacher says,” O.K. everybody, the word for today is fascinate, and you have to come up with a sentence using that word.” Little Cindy raises her hand and says,”I went to the zoo on Friday, and it was fascinating.” The teacher says, “That’s nice but we want to use fascinate, not fascinating.” Larry raises his hand and says,”I went to a movie Saturday and I was fascinated.” The teacher says,”That’s nice too, but we want to…
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A man was in a bar and began to tell a joke. His first words were “There was this dumb Pollack. . .” when he was interrupted by the bartender, who was enormous. “Wait a minute,” said the barkeep, “I’M Polish. See that huge guy by the door? HE’S Polish. And see that other guy down there? HE’S Polish. Now, are you sure you want to tell this joke?” “Heck, no,” the man exclaimed. “I’d have to explain it three…
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SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
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* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station… * If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with “quit while you’re ahead”? * I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me. They’re cramming for their “finals”. * I thought about how mothers feed their…
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what’s five words a man hates to hear? I’m pregnant and it’s yours.
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A guy comes home from work to see his girlfriend packed and waiting by the door. “I’m leaving you.” “Why?” he says. “Things were great this morning! What’s changed?” “I heard you were a pedophile.” The guy looks hard at his girl. “Pedophile? Hey! That’s an aaaaawfully big word for a 10 year old!”
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10. Beers at lunch get you reprimanded. 9. College sweatshirts are ‘casual’ instead of dress-up. 8. The 4 food groups are no longer beer, pizza, ramen and cereal. 7. Three Words: School Loan Payments. 6. Sneakers are now ‘weekend shoes’. 5. Jack and Cokes become Dewers on the Rocks. 4. You empathize with the characters from ‘Friends’. 3. Wine appreciation expands beyond Boone’s and Mad Dog. 2. You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time. And the Number 1 Sign…
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Once I was caught by an eye-catching phase that said “Take A Chance”. It was on a small box that had a picture of a beautiful car so I immediately filled out the information on the card, folded it up and placed it in the box. The next thing I knew, I had extra charges on my phone bill and my long distance company had been changed. I immediately switched back and everytime I see one of those boxes, I…
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A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his fiftieth birthday, so during this party he grabs the mic and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. “I will give anything they desire of mine, to the man who swims across that pool.” So the party continues with no events in the pool, until SUDDENLY, there is a great splash…
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