F word Jokes - page 35

Beethoven

A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of a sudden he hears some music. No one is around, so he starts searching for the source. He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads: Ludwig von Beethoven, 1770-1827. Then he realizes that the music is the Ninth Symphony and it is being played backwards! Puzzled, he leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with him.…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeBeethoven

Little Johnny’s Defense

Wednesday morning, Little Johnny comes into class late. The teacher called him to her desk and said, “Johnny, This is the third time you’ve been tardy this week.” Thinking of a punishment she says, “I want you to make a sentence out of these three words: defense, deduct, and detail.” So at recess Johnny comes back into the room and tells her that he’s done. He recites it to her: “De head of de duck goes over de fence before…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeLittle Johnny’s Defense

your mamma

your mamma so fat every time she turns around it is her birthday. your mamma so fat she has more chins than china town. your mamma is so fat she has her own zip code. your mamma is so fat that when she goes to get her shoes shined she has to take their word. your mammas so fat that when she goes to the beach she is the only one who gets a tan.

(0)
Loading...

Read Jokeyour mamma

exchange student

A new exchange student had just come to his new school and his teacher said to him, “To help you learn english faster I want you to write down four words during lunch that you really like!” The boy nodded and went to work. When he was in the playground he played a game his friends called “take off.” He liked those words so he wrote them down. Later he and his friends were playing a game where they had…

(1)Loading...

Read Jokeexchange student

Little Johnny gotta pee

Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of the sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He yelled out, “Miss Jones, I need to take a pee!!” The teacher replied, “Now, Johnny, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is ‘urinate.’ Please use the word ‘urinate’ in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go.” Little Johnny thinks for a bit, then says, “You’re…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeLittle Johnny gotta pee

15-incher

There was this guy who went to the doctor and said, “Doc, I have this bad stuttering problem, because of this, I can’t get no women and so I can’t get no pussy.” (saying every word in a stuttering mode) So the doctor checks him and finds the cause of his stuttering. He says, “Your penis is at least 15 inches and it’s so heavy that it’s pulling on the muscles of your tongue. That’s the cause of your stuttering.”…

(0)
Loading...

Read Joke15-incher

Lil Johnny

Lil’ Johnny on Politics Lil’ Johnny goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?” Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you The People. The nanny- well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we’ll call him The…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeLil Johnny