Eye to eye Jokes - page 22

Chemistry

A young college girl is studying in the library for a final exam when she is approached by a very tall and attractive young man. He sits down next to her and interrupts her study every five minutes or so to ask her questions. After about an hour of studying, and being interrupted, the young girl realizes that the young man is an idiot, and decides to go back to her room to study. As she stands up to leave,…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeChemistry

Footprints in the sand, and…

One night I had a wondrous dream, One set of footprints there was seen, The footprints of my precious Lord, But mine were not along the shore. But then some stranger prints appeared, And I asked the Lord, “What have we here?” Those prints are large and round and neat, “But Lord, they are too big for feet.” “My child,” He said in somber tones, “For miles I carried you alone. I challenged you to walk in faith, But you…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeFootprints in the sand, and…

Chet’s Nuts

It was Christmas time and Jim wanted to buy a nice present for his girlfriend. He walked into a pet shop and walked up to the front counter. “Excuse me, sir, but do you have any special pets?” Jim asked the man “Why yes right over there.” He pointed to a small parrot perched on a wooden stick inside a cage in the corner. “His name is CHET.” “Well, what does this bird do that is so special??” Jim asked.…

(2)Loading...

Read JokeChet’s Nuts

Murphy is Dying

An Irishman named Murphy went to his doctor after a long illness. The doctor, after a lengthy examination, sighed and looked Murphy in the eye and said, “I’ve some bad new for you … you have the cancer and it can’t be cured. I’d give you two weeks to a month.” Murphy shocked and saddened by the news, but of solid character, managed to compose himself and walk from the doctor’s office into the waiting room. There he saw his…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeMurphy is Dying

Top 10 Reasons Women Reject Men

TOP TEN REASONS WHY WOMEN REJECT MEN AND WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN 10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in “Deliverance.”) 9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. (You are one jurassic geezer.) 8. I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way. (You are the ugliest dork I’ve ever laid eyes upon.) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don’t want you spending the whole night or else…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeTop 10 Reasons Women Reject Men

Lovers

Two Lovers plan to commit Suicide. They were going to jump off of a cliff. The boy jumped first. The Girl closed her eyes before jumping then changed her mind saying Love is Blind. The Boy, in mid-air opened his parachute saying Love never Dies

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeLovers

Old man and a punker

An old man was riding a bus when it pulled to stop for new riders. A punker got on with spiked, yellow-blue and green hair, earrings in the eyes, ears and nose, and tattoos all over his body. The only seat available was right across from the old man. The old man was staring at the punker and after a few minutes the punker hollered, ?Hey you old fart, what are you staring at?? He replied, ? I was in…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeOld man and a punker

Beyond Reasonable Doubt

After a trial had been going on for three days, Harrison, the man accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge’s bench. “Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from ‘innocent’ to ‘guilty’ of the charges.” The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. “If you’re guilty, why didn’t you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?” he demanded. Harrison looked up, wide-eyed, and stated,…

(1)Loading...

Read JokeBeyond Reasonable Doubt

The Saw

There was this construction worker on the 7th floor of this unfinished building. He needed a hand saw, but was too lazy to go down and get it himself. He tried to call his fellow worker on the ground to get one for him, but this guy could not hear a word he said. So he started to give a sign so the guy on the ground could understand him. First he pointed at his eye (meaning “I”) then pointed…

(0)
Loading...

Read JokeThe Saw

Son of a parrot

A skinhead type gets on the bus with an orange Mohawk cut all spiked out, green side burns, the whole bit. Another more conventional and a generation older man can’t take his eyes of him. Finally the skinhead says, “What’s the matter, old man? Can’t stand something different?” The man replies kindly, “Oh no! It’s just that I screwed a parrot once and you may be my son.”

(1)Loading...

Read JokeSon of a parrot