Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Three guys, a father, son, and grandfather go out to play a round of golf. As they are on the way out to the first tee they are joking, bullshitting, and cussing, very much the men’s day out. Just before the son is ready to tee off, this fine looking woman walks up carrying her clubs. She says that her partner didn’t show and asks if she can join them. The guys say sure, since she is a really beautiful…
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For you ladies (and men so you’re prepared), a little MEN ARE LIKE humor: MEN ARE LIKE… Floor Tiles, if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years. MEN ARE LIKE… Bank Accounts, without a lot of money, they don’t generate much interest. MEN ARE LIKE… Blenders, you need one, but you’re not quite sure why. MEN ARE LIKE… Chocolate Bars, sweet, smooth and they usually head right to your hips. MEN ARE…
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A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity; looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed; driving his partner nuts. Finally, his exasperated partner says, “What’s taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!” The other guy answers, “My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot.” “Forget it, man,” his partner answered, “you don’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell of hitting…
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How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. Why do women have smaller feet than men? It’s one of those “evolutionary things” that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. How do you know…
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No, really, I’m O.K. to drive… – I’m wasted, and I am too embarrassed to have anybody see who I’m going with I’m not used to these darts… – I’m not used to throwing anything smaller than a pool cue when I’m this bombed. Let’s go out to my car and get some cigarettes…(male to female) – You would look great face down in my lap. Want to check out my new car stereo? (male to female) – I have…
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How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don’t know, because it has never happened. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good looking? They all already have boyfriends.
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Two morons were working in a pit, digging away, while their boss was up on normal ground, sitting next to his cadillac, drinking lemonade. One moron said, “Why do we have to be down here, while our boss is up there relaxing?” The other replied, “I don’t know, I’ll go up and ask him”, which he did. The boss replied, “It’s because I’m smart and you guys are morons”. “What makes you think that?”, asked the moron. “Let me show…
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A true story from Associated Press, by Kurt Westervelt. At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, the president, Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story: On March 23, 1994, the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten story building intending to commit…
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Two ropes are walking down the street and see a bar. So the first rope goes into the bar, sits down at a stool, and orders something to drink. The bartender growls, “Are you one of dem ropes?” And the rope replies,”Well, yes, I am.” The bartender yells, “Well, we don’t serve your kind!” And he twirls up the rope and throws him out onto the street. The second rope gets pretty worried and thinks, “I better disguise myself.” So…
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Parents are embarrassing, Take my dad. Every time a friend comes to stay the night, he does something that makes my face go red. Now don’t get me wrong. He is a terrific dad. I love him but sometimes I think he will never grow up. He loves playing practical jokes. This behavior first started one night when Anna came to sleep over. Unknown to me, dad sneaks into my room and puts Doona, our cat, on the spare bed.…
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