Co ed Jokes - page 84

True to Life

One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis, an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter’s portrait for a class assignment. Peter agreed, and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus. The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him the porportions in the painting were incorrect. “The head is too big,” the professor explained. “The…

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2 Black Kids Go Trick-or-treating

One Halloween night, two African American children, who are brother and sister, put on their costumes and go out of the house for some trick or treat. At the first house they stop by, the boy rings the doorbell. After a few minutes, an old white woman opens the door and asks, “And who might you two be?” “We’re Hansel and Gretel!” says the boy. “But you can’t be Hansel and Gretel. They’re white!” insists the old woman who promptly…

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Trading Presents

Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at the same time. The Italian boy’s father presents him with a brand-new pistol. On the other side of town, at his Bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boy receives a beautiful gold watch. The next day in school, the two boys are showing each other what they got. It turns out that each boy likes the other’s present better, and so they trade. That night, when the Italian boy…

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Self-Service Gas Station

I have a blonde friend who filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station. After he had paid and driven away, he realized that he had left the gas cap on top of his car. He stopped and looked and, sure enough, it was gone. Well, he thought for a second and realized that other people must have done the same thing, and that it was worth going back to look by the side of the road since…

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The Reason

Now I know that alot of people think that the chicken crossed the road for personal gain and self revalation or whatever else… But the real reason is simple. So ask yourself Why did the chicken cross the road? And realize that the only true answer to the question is this. To prove to the armadillo that it could be done.

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Breaststroke

There was a Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red Head and they had a competition to swim breaststroke across the English Channel. So off they went. 15 hours later the Brunette and the Red Head got out of the water. 5 hours later the Blonde got out of the water. ‘I want to protest. I want a judge,’ she screamed ‘What for,’ they asked. ‘You two used your arms.’

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Take the Temperature

The general was confined to the military hospital for treatment of a minor malady. For almost a week he made a complete nuisance of himself, irritating both staff and the other patients, demanding attention and expecting his every order to be followed immediately. He was in a six-man ward rather than a private room, his meals were too cold or not served to suit his taste, the light needed to be adjusted to his demands, the nighttime activities interfered with…

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Hold it!

This 92 year old man has been getting along by himself for years in his own house when he starts to become forgetful and begins to experience a few problems. His daughter suggests that maybe it’s time he goes into a home for the elderly. The old man reluctantly agrees, but recognizes that he might actually enjoy being around other people who probably share some of his interests, etc. So the daughter makes the arrangements, gets her father to the…

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A change was made

Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, “What was the problem?” “The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine, and wouldn’t fly the plane, until the problem was corrected,” he explained. “And it took an hour to correct the problem?” the passenger asked. “No,” the flight attendant replied, “It took an hour…

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Read JokeA change was made