Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Why was the women crossing the road? Sod crossing the road, what was she doing out of the kitchen. Why can’t women drive? There’s no road between the kitchen and the bedroom. Why do women have small feet? So they can get closer to the cooker.
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A man was driving down the highway and he saw a sheep with his head stuck in the fence. So the guy got out of the car and started humping the sheep. Another guy came along and said, “Can I have some of that?” The first guy said, “You’ll have to wait until I’m done.” Then the second guy said, “Do I have to stick my head in the fence, too?”
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An old lady went to her doctor because she was concerned about some lumps she had found under her breasts. The doctor gave her a thorough examination and told her, “Ma’am I have some good news and some bad news.” She said the she would like the good news first. The doctor said, “The lumps under your breast aren’t cancerous.” The old lady asked what the bad news was. The Doctor replied, “The lumps under you breasts are your feet.”
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Bill, Michael and their blonde friend, Stacy, were in the pub enjoying a few quiet drinks one night, when they decided to get in on the weekly raffle. The bought five $1 tickets each, seeing it was for charity. The following week, when the raffle was drawn, they each won a prize. Bill won the first prize: a whole year’s supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce. Michael won the second prize: a six month’s supply of gourmet spaghetti. Stacy won the…
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Q: What did the blonde say when the docotor told her that she was pregnant? A: Is it mine? —————————— Q: Why did the blonde have tire marks across her back? A: Because the sign said “Don’t Walk” —————————— Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker on the bottom of a pool. —————————— Q: Why did the blonde’s belly button hurt? A: ‘Cause her boyfriends were all blondes too. —————————— Q: How would you kill…
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There were two men who had gone to the same college and had become great friends. During college, they had a great time together. They were always right in the middle of anything happening. When they graduated, however, they each went their own separate ways. Two or three years later, they ran into one another on the street. They were very happy to see each other. During the conversation, one of them asked the other what he was doing for…
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A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his throat to the crowd of drinkers. He says, “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I’ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.” The room is quiet, and no one takes up the Texan’s offer. One man even leaves. Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left shows up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. “Is…
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How To Shower Like A Woman: 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so you can complain and whine even more about how you’re getting fat. 4. Get in the shower.…
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Yo mama is so fat she went outside and jumped up and got stuck. Yo mama is so poor, you and your family had a block of ice shaped like a turkey for thankgiving, talking bout “who wants to carve the ice ?” I make your mama feel so low that she could play raquetball against the curb.
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A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and THIS kitchen is delirious. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. If we are what we eat, then I’m easy, fast and cheap. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they…
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