Bill clinton Jokes - page 3

His baloney has a first name, It’s “I-did-not-inhale.” His baloney has a second name, “I-wasn’t-getting-tail.” Oh, he loves to sling it every day… The White House people all just saaaaaay… That Bill Clinton has-a-way Of making bullshit sound o-kaaay.

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One day at Little Bastard Elementary school, the children were at class in Mrs. Little’s class. She told the class that there was to be a special type of quiz that day and if you got your question right, you could go home early. “Alright class, who said ‘Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country’?” Little Suzy rose her hand and answered John Kennedy, so she was dismissed. “Now, who…

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Q: What is the difference between Bill Clinton and JFK? A: One got his head blown off in a car, the other was assassinated.

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Hurricane Georges slammed into the Florida Keys recently, doing a tremendous amount of damage, which brings up the following: Q: What do the Florida Keys and Bill Clinton’s crotch have in common? A: BOTH are “federal disaster areas”

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As Air Force One prepares to land, the captain makes his customary request over the loudspeaker: “Mr. President, would you please return the Flight Attendant to her upright position and prepare to land?” A reporter asked Clinton one day, “Was Monica lying?” Clinton responded, “No, she was on her knees.” Q: Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill every day at 5 am? A: She wants to make sure that she is the FIRST lady. Q: What is…

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I’m not sure if there is any truth to this, but it sure was funny. In anticipation of President Clinton’s visit to Oklahoma City, after tornadoes struck on May 3rd, one homeowner, whose home was destroyed, spray painted on what was left of his home, “HEY BILL, HOW’S THIS FOR A BLOW JOB?!” Before Clinton came, the Secret Service made him get rid of it.

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Q:..What is the difference between Bill Clinton and the Titanic? A:..They know exactly how many went down on the Titanic.

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Q: What is Bill Clinton’s worst nightmare? A: An intern with braces! (ewww!)

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Cupid asked his mother (the goddess of love), Aphrodite if Clinton really did cheat on his wife. It goes something like this…. “Mom, you know a lot about love, marriage, and adultury, did Bill Clinton really cheat on his wife, with Monica Lewinsky?” “Yes, but he didn’t mean to.” “That f**king a**hole!” “Hey, don’t speak about your father like that!”

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President Clinton was at the beach and got into trouble while swimming. He called for help, and three young men went to his rescue and pulled him ashore. Clinton wanted to show his gratitude, so he offered to give each of the young men what they would like, within reason. The first young man said that he would like to have a Harley Davidson motorcycle. Clinton told him he could select it and to just send him the bill. The…

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