Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A son came to the conclusion that he must put his dad in a nursing home, because his father could no longer get around. His father called him after the first night and said, “Son I’m so glad you put me in here.” “Why Dad?” his son asked “Because I woke up today with the biggest erection, I’ve had in years. And the nurse saw it and gave me oral sex.” “That’s great, Dad!” the son replied and they both…
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The class was playing a spelling game when the teacher asked for a word beginning with ‘A’. Johnny shot his arm into the air and blurted out ‘Asshole’. The teacher warned Johnny not to use such language again. She then asked for a word starting with ‘B’. Again Johnny shocked the class as he exclaimed ‘Bastard, miss.’ The teacher suitably repremanded Johnny and continued on. She decided to skip ‘C’ as she could imagine what Johnny would say. ‘D’ was…
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As you are all aware, the airline industry in which we work has it’s own unique set of terminology. The following are some of the most commonly used terms and their definitions. PASSENGER – A herding creature of widely varying intellect, usually found in pairs or small groups. Often will become vicious and violent in simple and easily rectified situations. When frightened or confused these creatures collect into a group called a “line.” This “line” has no set pattern and…
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Little Johnny was sitting in class one day while the teacher had asked the kids whenever she gives a letter from A-Z use a word that starts with that letter then use it in a sentence. The teacher goes ahead with her lesson and Starts out with “A” well Johnny was the first one to raise his hand, but the teacher thinks to herself she had better not, because she knows how Johnny is. So instead she picks Sandra. Sandra…
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And the Lord spoke to Noah and said: “In six months I’m going to make it rain until the whole earth is covered with water and all the evil people are destroyed. But I want to save a few good people, and two of every kind of living thing on the planet. I am ordering you to build an Ark.” And in a flash of lightning he delivered the specifications for an Ark. “OK,” said Noah, trembling in fear and…
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An Irish bloke goes to the doctor: “Dactor, it’s me ahrse. I’d loik ya ta teyhk a look, if ya woot”. So the doctor gets him to drop his pants and takes a look. “Incredible”. he says, “there is a $20 note lodged up here”. Tentatively he eases the twenty out of the man’s bottom, and then a $10 note appears. “This is amazing” exclaims the Doctor “What do you want me to do?” “Well fur gadness sake teyhk it…
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…CCA Prison Realty Trust? They’re buying Corrections Corp. of America in a $3.17 billion deal that will create the world’s largest penitentiary business. The merged entity will market its product under the more user-friendly name, “Motel 6-to-Life.” …Patrizia Martinelli, ex-wife of fashion heir Maurizio Gucci? She was convicted of ordering her husband’s murder and was sentenced to 29 years in prison. Most agree this is a tremendous price for a Gucci knockoff. …McDonald’s? They have a new series of TV…
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YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…
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A guy walked into the bar with his talking dog, Barney. Barney sat on the stool beside his owner. The bartender said, “We don’t serve drinks to dogs.” “That’s ok, I have Barney for conversation. He talks you know.” “Is that so?” said the bartender. “I’ll tell you what, you get Barney here to talk, and drinks are on the house.” Sure enough, the guy asked Barney to say a few words, and Barney said, “Hey bartender, nice place you’ve…
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With Viagra being such a hit, Pfizer is introducing a new line of drugs aimed at improving the performance of women in today’s society: DRIVEAGRA: One dose of this drug prior to leaving on a car trip will eliminate the woman’s constant compulsion to critique a man’s driving ability. Allows her to understand that she cannot drive from the passenger seat. MEMORAGRA: One tablet taken daily allowed 95% of women tested the ability to forget things their husbands said or…
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