Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
An old English couple was getting ready for bed when the husband said, “Honey, I love when you take off your blouse!” Blushing, the wife said, “Thank you.” The husband continued, “Honey, I love when you take off your bra!” “Even after all these years?” the wife asked. “Yes,” he replied. “Because then all the wrinkles come off of your face!!”
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It was supposed to be a happy time, but it wasn’t. Santa was really angry. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the Christmas cookies. The Elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had put in while making toys, and the reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. They had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and crashed it into a…
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A team of archaeologists were working when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A dog 2. A donkey 3. A shovel 4. A fish 5. A Star of David They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least more than three thousand years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists…
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This guy goes to college and after a few months writes his dad a letter: Dear dad, I’m having lots of fun, I have a girlfriend. Could you please send me some money? Johnny Well, after a couple of years, he just writes: No mon’, No fun, Yo son And his dad replied to this letter as so: Too bad, So sad, Yo dad!
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My 11 year old daughter and I were getting dressed in the bathroom the other morning. Being an avid gymnast, she hasn’t quite started to develop yet. As I was putting on my bra, she said, “Mom you need a bra to hold up your boobies, but I don’t.” I laughed and said, “Not yet you don’t.” She said, “No, but I got eye-bras to hold up my eyes though!” I laughed hysterically. This is a true story.
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You know those “special offers” that “you would be CRAZY to turn down”? Here’s how you might wish to respond to them: —————————————- To Whom It May Concern: Thank you for your recent e-mail to me. It was good hearing from you and reading your advertisement As information, I am a reasonably healthy male, over 40 years of age. If you sent me the ad/offer regarding how I may “enlarge my breasts,” I think I’ll pass, if you don’t mind.…
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Moses’ account of creation in the book of Genesis is so familiar and so entrenched in our cultural heritage, that many accept as actual historical fact, the assertion that Woman was created from one of Adam’s ribs. Science has railed against such simple beliefs for centuries. Last week at a dig in the escarpments along the western shore of the Dead Sea, archeologists uncovered ancient, original texts that predate Moses’ writings by 1,300 years. Translated, their account of life’s beginnings…
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Boudreaux and Thibodeaux were talking one afternoon, and Boudreaux tells Thibodeaux, “You know, I tink I’m ready for a lil vacation. But, dis year I wants to do sumting different. De last few year, I took your suggestion ’bout where to go. Tree year ago you say I should go to Hawaii, an’ I did an’ Marie got pregnant. And las year you tol me to go to Tahiti. Sho ‘nough, Marie got pregnant again.” So Thibodeaux asks Boudreaux, “What…
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Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? I hope you remember my story when they start getting frustrated. My three year old son had a lot of problems with potty training; and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven month…
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1. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings…they did it by killing all those who opposed them. 2. If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos…then you probably haven’t completely understood the seriousness of the situation. 3. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security. 4. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines. 5. Artificial Intelligence is…
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