Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
An old man was relaxing at his hundredth birthday party when a reporter went up to him. “Sir, what is the secret for your long life?” The man considered this for a moment, then replied, “Every day at 9 p.m. I have a glass of port. Good for the heart, I’ve heard.” The reporter replied, “That’s ALL?” The man smiled, “That, and canceling my voyage on the Titanic.”
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One day a man from Alabama comes to Georgia to get an education. He goes to the first professor he sees and says, “What can you teach me?” Shocked, the professor answers, “Well, I can teach you about the power of reasoning.” With a questioned look on his face, the man replied, “What’s that?” “I’ll give you an example,” said the professor. “Do you have a weedeater?” Although the question seemed strange, the man answered, “Yes, I do” “Well, if…
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TOP 20 JEWISH COUNTRY-WESTERN SONG TITLES 20. “If You Want to Play in Tel Aviv, You Gotta’ Have a Clarinet in the Band” 19. “I’ve Got Your Yarmulke, She’s Got You” 18. “You Put Out All The Candles On The Menorah Of My Heart” 17. “Achey-Breakey Matzoh” 16. “I Got Friends in Low Synagogues” 15. “My New Rabbi’s Named Jack Daniels” 14. “Bubba Shot the Cantor” 13. “Honkey Tonk Nights on the Golan Heights” 12. “My Rowdy Friend Elijah’s Comin’…
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A true story . . . . When Apollo Mission Astronaut, Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous “One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind” statement, but followed it by several remarks, usual com traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he reentered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark, “Good luck, Mr. Gorsky.” Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some…
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On his way home from school, Little Johnny always passed by a street corner where a group of prostitutes would be standing around. These streetwalkers would smile and wave their pinkies at Little Johnny while greeting him, “Hello there, cute little boy!” This went on for several days until Little Johnny decided to confront the prostitutes. He asked, “Why do you keep waving your pinkies at me?” The prostitutes laughed out loud and one of them said, “Oh, we were…
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It was a hot humid day in the African jungle. Elephant got word that tiger needed to talk to him. Thinking this was very weird because tiger never talked to anyone, he went any way. Elephant arrived and said, “What seems to be the trouble?” Tiger replied, “You know I have the worst luck with marriage.” “Oh ya why,” said elephant. “Because my first wife left me and my second one won’t.”
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A foreigner was touring the USA on holiday and stopped in a remote bar in the hills of Nevada. He was chatting to the bartender when he spied an old Indian sitting in the corner. He had tribal gear on, long white plaits, wrinkled face. “Who’s he?” said the foreigner. “That’s the Memory Man.” said the bartender. “He knows everything. He can remember any fact. Go and try him out.” So the foreigner goes over, and thinking he won’t know…
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And the Lord spoke to Noah and said: “In six months I’m going to make it rain until the whole earth is covered with water and all the evil people are destroyed. But I want to save a few good people, and two of every kind of living thing on the planet. I am ordering you to build an Ark.” And in a flash of lightning he delivered the specifications for an Ark. “OK,” said Noah, trembling in fear and…
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An Irish bloke goes to the doctor: “Dactor, it’s me ahrse. I’d loik ya ta teyhk a look, if ya woot”. So the doctor gets him to drop his pants and takes a look. “Incredible”. he says, “there is a $20 note lodged up here”. Tentatively he eases the twenty out of the man’s bottom, and then a $10 note appears. “This is amazing” exclaims the Doctor “What do you want me to do?” “Well fur gadness sake teyhk it…
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YO MAMMA IS SO FAT ?Yo momma so fat her nickname is “DAMN!” ?Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. ?Yo momma so fat we’re in her right now ?Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise ?Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone ?Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors ?Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off…
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