Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
This couple had been married for about five years, and one day, as they are out working in the yard, the man tells his wife, “Man! Your butt is getting fat!” She gets ticked off and moves to another part of the yard. The husband follows her and says, “You know, looking at that big gas grill over there, I’ll bet your butt is as big as that grill. It’s HUGE!” The wife gets really mad, tells him HE can…
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Q: What is the difference between Bill Clinton and John Kennedy? A: One got his brains blown off and the other got shot.
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A very busy corporate lawyer was called out of an important meeting to the bedside of an extremely wealthy widow who was one of the firm’s most prestigious clients. She was also well-known for her devoted Christian faith. The lawyer was ushered into the bedroom of the widow and asked, “What can I do for you, Mrs. Warbucks?” “Just come and stand beside my bed,” she said while lying in bed. The lawyer did as he was told. A few…
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George was sitting at his desk and stressing over the upcoming deadlines when his boss came up to him. Their conversation went as follows: Boss: “George, when is the last time you took a vacation?” George: “Sir, I don’t have time for a vacation. There is way too much work to be done.” Boss: “George, I believe you would be more productive if you took some time to get away from your work and relax for a little bit.” George:…
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Pillsbury Dough Boy wanted for attempted murder A lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked next to a car with a woman sitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head, apparently sleeping. When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her hands still behind her head but with her eyes open. The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped…
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It’s Halloween and little Johnny is Trick-or-Treating and is dressed up as a pirate. He comes up to a house and a nice old lady answers the door. The lady looks at Johnny and says, ‘What a cute pirate. Where are your little buccaneers??’ Johnny looks at the lady and says, ‘They’re under my buck’en (F*****G) hat!!’
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1. The last fight we had was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!” 2. In the beginning God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then neither God nor man has rested. 3. My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog. 4. Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-laws. 5. Young son: Is it…
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December 14th Dearest John: I went to the door today and UPS was here with a partridge in a pear tree. What a delightful gift. I couldn’t have been more surprised. With dearest love and affection, Agnes December 15th Dearest John: Today, UPS brought your very sweet gift. Just imagine, two turtle doves? I’m just delighted at your very thoughtful gift. They are just adorable. All my love, Agnes December 16th Dear John: Oh, aren’t you the extravagant one! Now…
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The young bride’s mother had some old-fashioned ideas of marriage, and passed them on to her daughter. “Never let your husband see you in the nude,” she advised. “You should always wear something.” “Yes, mother,” replied the obedient girl. Two weeks after the wedding, the girl and her brand-new husband were preparing to retire when the guy asked, “Dear, has there ever been any insanity in your family?” “Not that I know of,” she answered. “Why?” “Well, we’ve been married…
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1. Men are like department stores…. their clothes should always be half off. 2. Men are like vacations…. they never seem to be long enough. 3. Men are like computers… hard to figure out and never have enough memory. 4. Men are like coolers… load them with beer and you can take them anywhere. 5. Men are like chocolate bars…. sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like coffee…. the best ones are rich,…
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