Wa wa Jokes - page 386

New Secretary

A guy walked into his friend’s office and found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. “Hey, what’s up with you?”, he asks. “Oh, it’s my wife”, replied the man sadly. “She’s hired a new secretary for me.” “Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?” “Neither, he’s bald.”

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TWO IRISH MEN AND A BLONDE

There were two Irish men and a blonde walking in the jungle and they came across a man who told them they could have any one thing and would be thrown in a hole for ten years with a ten year supply of that one thing. So the first Irish man asked for a ten year supply of Irish whisky and was thrown in a hole. The second Irish man asked for a ten year supply of Irish whisky too…

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GASH

Ralph, feeling very ill, goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo tests. After the lengthy exam, he wakes up hungry and quite groggy. Ralph looks about, noticing that he is now in a private room at the hospital. Just then the phone by his bed rings… “This is your doctor,” said the serious voice. “We just got the results back from your battery of tests. Obviously, you have lead a very promiscuous life.”…

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The Bear & the Hunter

A hunter was out one day, crouched down for nearly an hour when he noticed this bear crawl by. So, without hesitation, he fired his shotgun at the bear. A cloud of dirt went up, but there was nothing there. Finally, he felt a tap on his sholder. It was the bear. “What are you doing? You can’t shoot me. Turn around and pull down your pants for some sweet lovin’ or I’m going to rip you to pieces.” The…

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Stuck

A man and his wife are driving down a deserted road while on vacation. In the deepening gloom, the man fails to see a deer in the road until the last second. In a panic he swerves and drives off the road, down an embankment and into a tree. Now, the collision was so bad that the couples clothes were shredded and they were left essentially naked. The husband was trapped in the wreckage but the wife managed to free…

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A Full Cup of Coffee

The young clerk’s responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every day. Each morning the judge was enraged that the coffee cup arrived two-thirds full. The clerk explained that he had to rush to get the coffee delivered while it was still hot, which caused him to spill much of it along the way. None of the judge’s yelling and insults produced a full cup of coffee, until he finally threatened to cut…

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Airplane Flasher

A man in an overcoat was about to board a plane when the stewardess asked to see his ticket. He opened his overcoat and flashed her. “Sorry, Sir,” she smiled, “I’m checking your ticket…not your STUB.”

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Linda Tripp

One day Hercules, Cinderella, and Quasimodo all met togather and decided to have a picnic. Hercules stands and says, “I’m the strongest man in the world!” Cinderella stands and says, “Well I’m the prettiest woman in the world!” Quasimodo says, “I’m the ugliest in all the land!” So they decided to go home that night and pray to the gods and ask if all of this was true, and said they would meet the next day. Hercules arrives and says,…

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POSSIBLE TITLES FOR LEWINSKY’S NEW BOOK:

I Suck At My Job What Really Goes Down In The White House How I Blew It In Washington You Have to Work Hard to Find the Softer Side of the President Clear and Present Boner Testing the Limits of the Gag Rule Going Back for Gore Podium Girl Secret Services to the President Harass is Not Two Words: The Story of Bill Clinton Deep Inside The Oval Office The Congressional Study on White House Intern Positions She’s Chief of…

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Read JokePOSSIBLE TITLES FOR LEWINSKY’S NEW BOOK: