Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man at a nudist camp got a letter from his mother asking for a picture. Since the only pictures he had were taken in the nude, he cut one in half and mailed her the part showing him only from the waist up. His mom wrote back after receiving the photograph and said, “Thanks for the picture. Can your grandma have one too?” The guy thought, “Since grandma can’t see well, I’ll just give her the bottom half,” and…
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A guy is strolling down the street in Chicago where he comes across an old lamp. He picks it up, rubs it vigorously, and out pops a genie. The genie offers to grant him one wish, to which the guy replies “I’ve always wanted to be lucky.” The genie grants his wish. So off the guy strolls, wondering how this will change his life, when he spies 10 dollars on the sidewalk. Not a bad start he thinks. As he…
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A freshman at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to the alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. In his project he urged people to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical “dihydrogen monoxide.” The petition stated the following: 1. It can cause excessive sweating and vomiting. 2. It is…
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” Yeah, whatever..” ” It’s your stomach..” ” Would you like that cooked?”.. ” How much salt is TOO much?..” ” If your order is hot, then consider it a gift..” ” You don’t actually think I’m listening, do you?”.. ” Don’t mind the open sore on my lip when you get to the window”.. ” I’m just getting over Hepatitus”.. ” I have to pee, can you hold on a minute?..
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…. AnD dRiVe OtHeR PeOpLe iNsAnE: At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Page yourself over the intercom. (Don’t disguise your voice.) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them…
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One night, a couple goes to a chinese resturant to celebrate their anniversary. They are happily chatting away when the waiter comes up and asks them what they would like to order. “I don’t know what I want”, says the woman. “What are your specials?” “Well, tonight we have a spactacular special. It is called “Cream of Sumyung Gi. It’s ingredients are a family secret, but all the customers who have had it rave about the taste.” The woamn orders…
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There was this guy named Joe. Ever since he was born, he has always been 2nd at everything. His baby stroller was always slower than the other kids’, his tricycle was old and rusted and had wobbly wheels, his first bike was a piece of junk, his first car wouldn’t go over 35 m.p.h. So Joe resigned himself to a life of slowness, never able to win a race in his life. Until one day, when his rich uncle died…
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God: And remember Moshe, in the laws of keeping Kosher, never cook a calf in its mother’s milk. It is cruel, Moshe (Moses): Ohhhhhh! So you are saying we should never eat milk and meat together. G: No, what I’m saying is, never cook a calf in its mother’s milk. M: Oh, Lord forgive my ignorance! What you are really saying is we should wait six hours after eating meat to eat milk so the two are not in our…
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A guy walks into a bird store, and right near the front counter is a big bird in a cage. On the cage is a note that reads: Here is Harry, the worlds most religous bird. The most religous bird? the customer asks. The store owner says, sure If you pull Harry’s left leg he will say the Hail Mary. The guy says this can’t be true, but the store owner says, go ahead and pull it. So he does,…
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PLEASE FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS. 1. Say COW before each word: Cows About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look 2. Say COW after each word: Cows About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look 3. Say COW before and after each word: cows About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look 4. Start at the bottom and read the words upwards. Cows About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look
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