Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
WA NING! The e is a new, pa ticula ly wicked vi us ci culating on the inte net. It will cause you ” ” key on you keyboa d to no longe function, eplacing it with a blank space. This bothe some vi us can a ive on you compute as an incoming e-mail, o can be downloaded f om a webpage. What is wo se, it can make you THINK you have co ected the p oblem, by…
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A man was in a bar and began to tell a joke. His first words were “There was this dumb Pollack. . .” when he was interrupted by the bartender, who was enormous. “Wait a minute,” said the barkeep, “I’M Polish. See that huge guy by the door? HE’S Polish. And see that other guy down there? HE’S Polish. Now, are you sure you want to tell this joke?” “Heck, no,” the man exclaimed. “I’d have to explain it three…
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SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
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One day farmer Jones was in town picking up supplies for his farm. He stopped by the hardware store and picked up a bucket and an anvil, then stopped by the livestock dealer to buy a couple of chickens and a goose. Now he had a problem: how to carry all of his purchases home. The livestock dealer said, “Why don’t you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm…
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1. Pedal-powered dialysis machines. 2. Use of antibiotics deemed an “unauthorized experimental procedure,” 3. Head-wound victim in the waiting room is on the last chapter of “War and Peace,” 4. Exam room has a tip jar. 5. You swear you saw salad tongs and a crab fork on the instrument tray just before the anesthesia kicked in. 6. “Will you be paying in eggs or pelts?” 7. Tight budget prevents acquisition of separate rectal thermometers. 8. “Take two leeches and…
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Three men – one Jewish, one Hispanic and one Italian – die and go to heaven. They meet St. Peter at the gate. St. Peter says there is only room for one soul at this time. He continues to say that the Pearly Gates need repair and the three men must offer bids to God to repair the Gates. Whoever gives the best bid will then be permitted to enter. Each man goes off in a different direction to carefully…
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1.If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us. 2.Learn to work the toilet seat: if it’s up, put it down. 3.Birthdays, Valentines and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present, again! 4.Sometimes, we’re not thinking about you. Live with it. 5.Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss the shotgun formation and monster trucks. 6.Get rid of your cat. And no, it’s not different, it’s just…
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The symphony orchestra was performing Beethoven’s Ninth. In the piece, there’s a long passage, about 20 minutes, during which the bass violinists have nothing to do. Rather than sit around that whole time looking stupid, some of them decided to sneak offstage and go to the tavern next door for a quick one. After slamming several beers in quick succession, one of them looked at his watch and said, “Hey! We need to get back!” “No need to panic,” said…
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One day, a old lady decides to buy a parrot to keep her company. As soon as she brings it home…she sets it up in the corner in a nice cage, sits down, and starts to read a book. Pretty soon she hears…. “What the hell are you reading?” Astounded that her parrot talked like that, she told her parrot… “If I hear that out of you one more time, you will be punished.” A few minutes later, she hears……
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A very elderly couple went to see a lawyer. They were ushered gently into the lawyer’s inner office, and sat across the desk from the attorney who was studying the couple’s papers. He looked up after a moment. “How can I help you today, Mr. and Mrs. Watson?” The woman piped up in a thin, reedy voice. “We’ve come to get your help in filing for a divorce.” “A divorce?” The lawyer was stunned. “If you don’t mind my asking,…
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