Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Th th th Jokes - page 59
The Economics of Art
Friends lunching at the home of Pablo Picasso in the south of France commented on the fact that their host had none of his own paintings on the walls. “Why is that, Pablo?” one of them asked. “Don’t you like them?” “On the contrary,” replied the painter, “I like them very much. It’s just that I can’t afford them.”
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One of those Day-vorces
A farmer walked into an attorney’s office wanting to file for a divorce. The attorney asked, “May I help you?” The farmer said, “Yea, I want to get one of those day-vorces.” The attorney said, “Well do you have any grounds?” The farmer said, “Yea, I got about 140 acres.” The attorney said, “No, you don’t understand, do you have a case?” The farmer said, “No, I don’t have a Case, but I have a John Deere.” The attorney said,…
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The Scotsman
There was this Scottish guy, all dressed up in his kilt etc. sitting in a bar and he was a bit strapped for cash. He was trying to work out how to solve his problem when this guy with a tea towel on his head, a cigar and a moustache came in. He watched the guy order a whole heap of alcohol. Whe the bartender asked him to pay he just said, “Charge it to the Arafat account.” Now after…
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The Gang Who Couldn’t Shoot Straight
A True Remarkable Occurrence: Two gangsters, James Gallo and Joe Conigliaro, set about to murder a stool pigeon, Vinny Ensulo, alias Vinnie Ba Ba, alias Vincent Ennsie. On November 1, 1973 they jumped him on Columbia Street, Brooklyn, and took him for a ride. Gallo pointed a gun at his head from the right, and Conigliaro covered him from the left. The car swerved violently. The two gangsters shot each other. The New York Daily News described the sequel: “Concigliaro,…
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The Familial Decision
For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap! “Helen, why didn’t you write when you learned you were pregnant?” he cried. “I would have rushed up here, we could have…
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King Arthur & the Old Witch
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur?s youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed. The question was: What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the…
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Golf Threesome
Moses and Jesus are part of a threesome playing golf one day. Moses pulls up to the tee and drives a long one. The ball lands on the fairway, but rolls directly toward a water trap. Quickly, Moses raises his club, the water parts, and the ball rolls to the other side, safe and sound. Next, Jesus strolls up to the tee and hits a nice long one directly toward the same water trap. It lands right in the center…
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10 things women will NEVER understand about Men:
Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do, wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll…
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The 3 inch man
A man walks into a bar and says, “Bartender, give me two shots. One for me and one for my best buddy.” Bartender says, “You want them both now or do you want me to wait until your buddy arrives to pour his?” The guy says, “Oh, I want them both now. I’ve got my best buddy in my pocket here.” He then pulls a little 3 inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks, “You mean to say,…
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