Lord’s Prayer, Child’s Version
A six-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord”s Prayer at a church service: “And forgive us our trash passes as we forgive those who passed trash against us.”
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Th th th Jokes - page 487
What’s Yours is Ours
At a small parish in rural New England, there lived a priest and several nuns. One day, one of the older nuns was noticing that the rugs in the church were beginning to fray. She went to the priest and told him, “Father, I believe your rugs need to be replaced soon.” The priest thanked her for bringing it to his attention, and told her that he thought that she had been there long enough to refer to church property…
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chewing gum
Q Why did the chewing gum cross the road? A Because it was stuck to the chicken’s foot!
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What’s Your Secret?
An old man was relaxing at his hundredth birthday party when a reporter went up to him. “Sir, what is the secret for your long life?” The man considered this for a moment, then replied, “Every day at 9 p.m. I have a glass of port. Good for the heart, I’ve heard.” The reporter replied, “That’s ALL?” The man smiled, “That, and canceling my voyage on the Titanic.”
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Roman
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth? A. Glad-he-ate-her.
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His Alibi
“Armstrong,” the boss said, “I happen to know that the reason you didn’t come to work yesterday and that was because you were out playing golf.” “That’s a rotten lie!” Armstrong protested. “And I have the fish to prove it!”
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How many?
Q:How many passengers can fit in a VW Beetle? A:71….69 at the back and 2 in front watching.
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Protest sign
Somebody erected a picket sign alongside Highway 95 in Nevada. Evidently, someone doesn’t want any more hotels and casinos being built, because the black-on-orange sign read “END CONSTRUCTION”.
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Robbery
A man was walking down a street in Washington. A man walking behind him suddenly pulled out a gun and said, “Gimme all your money, now!” The victim said, “You can’t do this to me! I’m a Congressman!” The robber thought for a moment, then said, “In that case, gimme all of MY money!”
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First Day of School
It was the first day of school and after lunch, the teacher, Miss Adams, was passing out candy treats wrapped in foil. She was then asking each child to identify what they had been given. When she came around to little Eddie, he could not name the Hershey ‘kiss’ he had received. “All right, Eddie”, said Miss Adams. “Here’s a hint. It’s something your daddy wants from your mommy when he gets home from work. Take a bite and tell…
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