Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A guy walks into a bar and sits next to another guy. The bartender asks him if he wants their extra-special drink. The man replies, “What’s so special about it?” The bartender says, “It can make you fly.” “No way! There’s no chance in hell anyone could ever fly,” he stubbornly replies. “I’ll show you. Here, this man next to you will take a drink of this, and will fly off a cliff and come back up unharmed.” “OK, show…
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Q.What do you do if your wife is standing next to your couch? A.Take her back to the kitchen and shorten the chain.
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African American guy walks into a pet store with his parrot to buy some birdseed. He walks up to the counter, and points to the seed. The cashier gets it for him, and while he rings it up, he says, “He’s beautiful! Where did you get him from?” Parrot says, “In Africa. There’s millions of them!”
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Tom’s best friend wakes him up on sunday morning after a long night of partying and drags him to church. Despite Tom’s pleas for sleep his friend forces him to sit through the entire sermon. As the priest begins his sermon Tom drifts asleep. The priest asks the church, “Why are we gathered here this morning?” At that very moment Tom’s friend, noticing Tom is asleep, jabs a pencil into Tom’s leg. Tom jumps up and screams “FOR THE LOVE…
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Jack Benny was invited to visit the White House. A guard stopped him and asked what he had in the violin case he was carrying. “A machine gun,” said Benny solemnly. With the same solemnity, the guard said, “Oh, okay, enter. I was afraid for a moment that it was your violin.”
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A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, “I’m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play.” The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, “Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer…
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Two atoms were walking down the street the other day when they bumped into each other. “Ow, that hurts,” said the first atom. “Oh, I’m sorry,” the second atom apologized. “Are you okay?” “I think so,” replied the first atom. “But I lost a neutron!” “Are you sure?” asked the second atom. The first atom said, “I’m positive!”
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Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don’t have film. Corduroy pillows: They’re making “headlines”! Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark. Who is “Gen. Failure,” and why is he reading my hard disk? I poured spot remover on my dog, now he’s gone. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out. I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. Why do psychics have to ask for your name? Wear short…
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The first-grade teacher was showing pictures of animals to her students to see how many they could name. She held up a picture of a lamb, and a little girl said, “That’s a sheep!” “That’s right!” said the teacher. “How about THIS one?” she said, holding up a picture of the king of beasts. “That’s a lion!” answered a little boy. “Right!” said the teacher. Then she held up a picture of a deer. No one volunteered an answer. She…
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A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages. “Momma, look what I found,” the boy called out. “What have you got there, dear?” his mother asked. With astonishment in the young boy’s voice,…
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