Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A blonde was speeding down the highway when she was stopped by an officer. “Please, officer, let me go!” she cried. Admiring the blonde’s body, the officer said, “I’ll only let you go if you give me a little hanky-panky.” Confused, the blonde asked, “Which TeleTubby is that?”
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There is a guy sitting at a bar. After a little bit, an alien walks in and sits next to him. The alien has a few drinks and leans over to the guy and touches him with his finger and says “zap.” The guy ignores him the first couple of times. After a while though, he starts to get annoyed. First he asks the alien to stop, then starts demanding, then the guy threatens to pull the alien’s pants down…
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I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in the cellar, and my wife insisted I empty the contents of each bottle down the sink, or else. After careful consideration, I reluctantly agreed and finally proceeded with the unpleasant task. I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank. Then, I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of…
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One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe say’s to Mike behind him, “My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor.” “Listen, you don’t have to spend that kind of money.” Mike replies. “There’s a diagnostic computer down at Wal-mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what’s wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars…a lot cheaper than a doctor.” So Joe…
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Looking for a place to sit down, a drunk wandered into a church during Sunday services just as the priest was asking, “Who wants to go to Heaven?” The entire congregation waved their hands in the air and responded, “I do, I do!” The drunk began to raise his hand, looked around, and then lowered his hand. Later in his sermon, the priest asked again, “Who wants to go to Heaven?” The entire congregation again answered, “I do, I do!”…
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There once was a couple named Kelly Who lived their lives belly to belly. Because in their haste They used library paste, Instead of petroleum jelly.
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A woman awoke during the middle of the night to find her husband missing from the bed. She thought it was strange because he never got up during the middle of the night. Soon about 20 minutes went by and he still hadn’t returned. Somewhat worried she went looking for him. He wasn’t in the bathroom so she went downstairs. He wasn’t in the TV room or the kitchen getting something to eat. Becoming more worried she noticed the basement…
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A pretty blonde woman asks the young male clerk in the drugstore for some bottom deodorant. The clerk, somewhat bemused, explains to the blonde that they don’t sell ‘bottom’ deodorant . . .just the underarm type. The blonde, undismayed, assures the clerk that she has been buying ‘bottom’ deodorant here for several years, is quite satisfied with the product, and would like more. The puzzled clerk asks the phamacist if he can help the young lady. The pharmacist smiles and…
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A husband, proving to his wife that women talk more than men, showed her a study which indicated that men use, on the average, only 15,000 words a day, whereas women use 30,000 words a day. She thought about this for awhile and then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say. He said, “What?”
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One day there were 3 old men sitting around in a retirement home.There was a 70 year old,an 80 year old, and a 90 year old. The 70 year old said,”I wish I could take a healthy piss again.” Then the 80 year old said,”I can take a healthy piss, but I wish I could take a healthy shit again.” Then the 90 year old said,”I take a healthy piss around 9:00 am, and a healthy shit around 11:00 am,…
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