Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
This is a bit of a tongue twister… A bear walks into a bar in Boise Idaho. “Bartender, give me a beer!” To which the bartender replies, “I don’t serve beer to bears in bars in Boise Idaho”. The bear repeats himself, “Bartender, give me a beer!!!” “I’m sorry,” repeats the bartender, “but I don’t serve beer to bears in bars in Boise Idaho”. The bear is becoming upset by this time. “Look,” he says “if you don’t serve me…
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The eighty-eight-year-old millionaire married an eighteen-year- old country girl. He was quite content, but after a few weeks she told him that she was going to leave him if she didn’t get some loving real soon. He had his chauffeured limousine take him to a high-priced specialist who studied him and then gave him a shot of spermatozoa. “Now look,” the doctor said, “the only way you’re going to get it up is to say “beep,” and then to get…
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Here’s the background: Ian works in a coffee, bagels, and sandwiches trailer on the campus of UNH. (The University of New Hampshire, for those not from the East Coast of the U.S.) Vinnie is his boss and the owner of the truck, and yes, according to Ian, this actually happened. Ian is telling the story. Her: Yes, I’d like a milk with some coffee in it. Me: So, that’s just a splash of coffee in a milk? Her: No, a…
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Three ladies are sitting in a bar and they decide to give their husbands nicknames. They decide to name them after drinks. The first lady says, “I am going to name my husband 7up because he is 7 inches and always up.” The second lady says, “I am going to name my husband Mountain Dew because he is always mountin’ the dew.” The third lady says, “I am going to name mine Jack Daniels because he is a hard licker.”
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Little Johnny was thrilled when his turn came to enter kindergarten. To make sure he had plenty of time to eat a good breakfast and get ready on the first day, his mother woke everybody up early–so early that it was still dark. After looking outside, Little Johnny went down the hall and found his mother dressing in the bedroom. He looked so troubled that his mother asked, “What’s wrong?” mustering as much cheerfulness into her voice as she could…
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Bubba’s old lady had been pregnant for some time, and now the time had come. So, he brought her to the doctor, and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Bubba and said, “Hey, Bubba! You just had you a son!” Bubba got all excited, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, “Hold on, son! We ain’t finished up here yet!” The doctor then delivered a little…
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English in Non-English Speaking Countries! Examples of how English is being used in different parts of the world: In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In…
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George, spotting a nice-looking gal in a bar, goes up and starts small talk. Since she didn’t back off, he asked her name. “Carmen,” she replied. “That’s a nice name,” he said, warming up the conversation. “Who named you, your mother?” “No, I named myself,” she answered. “Oh, that’s interesting. Why Carmen?” “Because I like cars, and I like men,” she said, looking directly into his eyes. “What’s YOUR name?” “Beerf**k,” said George.
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Two ladies are sitting next to each other on a plane. One is a Yankee and the other, a Southern Belle. The Southern Belle turns to the Yankee and asks, “So, where y’all from?” The Yankee turned her steely gaze to the Southern Belle and replied, “I am from a place where we do NOT end our sentences with a preposition.” Silence ensues and the flight continues until a few minutes later when the Southern Belle again turns to the…
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A man walks into a bar and orders 5 shots. The bartender lines them up and the man starts shooting them back. The bartender looks at him and says, “I don’t think you should be drinking them that fast!” The man looks up and says, “You would too if you had what I have.” “What’s that?” asks the bartender. The man stands up and grins and replies, “75 cents.”
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