Street one Jokes - page 13

Two Blondes

Two blondes are walking down the street. They turn the corner and walk into a building.You think one of them whould have seen it…….

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Kid on a Tricycle

There was this young boy who really liked going fast. So his parents bought him a tricycle. One day his brother came over with his brand new car. The young boy ran up to his brother and begged him to give him a ride in his new, fast car. The brother said “How about this. I’ll tie your tricyle to the back of my car and I’ll pull down the street.” The young boy accepted immediately. The arrangement was that…

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lucky!

A guy is strolling down the street in Chicago where he comes across an old lamp. He picks it up, rubs it vigorously, and out pops a genie. The genie offers to grant him one wish, to which the guy replies “I’ve always wanted to be lucky.” The genie grants his wish. So off the guy strolls, wondering how this will change his life, when he spies 10 dollars on the sidewalk. Not a bad start he thinks. As he…

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Whole Lotta Yo Mama

SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…

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I believe

There was a Christian lady who lived next door to an atheist. Everyday, when the lady prayed, the atheist guy could hear her. He thought to himself, “She sure is crazy, praying all the time like that. Doesn’t she know there isn’t a God?” Many times while she was praying, he would go to her house and harass her, saying “Lady, why do you pray all the time? Don’t you know there is no God?” But she kept on praying.…

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So, where ya from?

These two guys are sitting in a pub, getting hammered. One turns to the other and asks, “So, whe’re ya from?” “I’m from Dublin”, the other replies. “Dublin!, me *hic* too…bartender, get us a beer!” A moment later he asks again, “Where did ye *hic* go ta school?” The man answers, “St. Mary’s, *belch* graduated in ’46.” “St. Mary’s? 46!?”…exclaims the man, “Tarbender, *hic-belch* get us another beer!” “So, what part of Dublin did ya *belch* grow up in?” “The…

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The Rock

One day, a well-to-do lady was walking home and met an old beggar on the street. “Madame,” said the beggar, leaning over to pick up a rock from the side of the road, “I will eat this rock for your enjoyment.” Well, the lady had never seen a man eat a rock before, so she agreed. “First,” said the man, “I will need to cook it.” The lady agreed and took the man to her home, where she showed him…

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Horoscopes for Southerners

It has become pretty obvious to me that our present astrological signs have served their purpose and that we should get rid of them. When I’m out driving around I’ll see bulls, and once in a great while I suppose I’ll even see a ram. Up the street from me there’s some twins, but I don’t see them much. The rest of these things are just too obscure. You only see crabs on vacation. There are no lions, or scorpions,…

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Surprise, surprise….

Two friends meet on the street and one gives the good news to the other…. Did you know that I finally had a son on Monday? Gosh, congratulations, and…how is your wife doing? Oh, I guess she is doing great so far, but wait until she finds out about the baby..

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Coming to grips with illness

A man goes to his doctor for a check up and the doctor says:- “I don’t know how to tell you this, but you’re going to die, and you only have six months left.” When the poor bloke gets home, he tells his wife he has AIDS and only has six months to live and goes out for a beer. He gets pissed up and tells all his mates he has AIDS and only six months left. Two days later…

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