Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Like a lot of husbands throughout history, Webster would sit down and try to talk to his wife. But as soon as he would start to say something, his wife said, “And what’s that supposed to mean?” Thus, Webster’s Dictionary was born.
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Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it’s annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do, wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they’ll…
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Spend more quality time with Chelsea and her 13 half brothers and sisters. Tour the nations’ prisons to improve conditions. Visit friends while there. Write book: “The American Presidency: An Oral History.” Search for a new outlet for well-developed lying and cheating skills. Catch up on eight-year stack of “Penthouse.” Continue work counseling interns. Get to know those Bush girls better.
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An inter-office softball game was held every year between the Marketing and Support Staff of one company. The Support Staff whipped the Marketing Department soundly. To show just “how” the Marketing Department earns their keep, they posted this memo on the bulletin board after the game: “The Marketing Department is pleased to announce that for the 1999 Softball Season, we finished in 2nd place, having lost but one game all year. The Support Department, however, had a rather dismal season,…
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Dear Mom and Dad: It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in nothaving written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before youread on, please sit down. YOU ARE NOT TO READ ANY FURTHER UNLESS YOU ARE SITTING DOWN. OKAY! Well then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture and the concussion I got when…
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1. Marriage is a 3 ring circus: engagement ring wedding ring suffering 2. Marriages are made in heaven… Then again, so are thunder and lightning 3. Marriage is when a man and a woman become one. The problem is WHICH ONE? 4. Marriage is not a word. It is a life long exclamation. 5. Marriage is when fantasy wins over reality. Reality bites! 6. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the “y” becomes silent.…
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After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks and insane regulations at the Department of Motor Vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son. I brought my selection – a baseball bat – to the cash register. “Cash or charge?” the clerk asked. “Cash,” I snapped. Then apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, “I’ve spent the afternoon at the motor-vehicle bureau.” “Shall I giftwrap the bat?” the clerk asked sweetly. “Or…
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Everyone knows of the Chunnel running from England to France, but does everyone know this story? Four people got on the Chunnel: One was a young woman, who looked exactly like one of the models from fashion magazine. The next was a very old very rich woman, then a decorated Sergeant Major. Last but not least was a Private, fresh out of boot camp. The four got talking and all of a sudden the lights went out, there was the…
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One day, little 6-year-old Eddie walked into the bathroom just as his mother was stepping out of the shower. He could not remember ever seeing her without clothes on. So when his father came home that evening, Eddie took him aside and told him what had happened. “It was scary, Daddy, she doesn’t have a weenie like we do. . .just a big hairy slit between her legs.” “Yes, that’s true, Eddie”, said his father, trying to think of a…
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This is a bricklayer’s accident report that was printed in the newsletter of the English equivalent of the Workers’ Compensation Board. This is this Bricklayer’s report … a true story. Dear Sir; I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block #3 of the accident reporting form. I put “Poor Planning” as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient. I am a bricklayer…
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