Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Bill Clinton and Al Gore are being flown by Bill Gates in his private plane. The plane crashes and all three are killed. The three ascend to heaven and are met by The Lord. God first asks Gore what he believes. Gore says, “I believe humankind has really messed up the bounteous and beautiful planet that You gave to them. They should be taught to care for it better.” God said he liked Gore’s answer and asked him to take…
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All babies start out with the same number of raw cells which, over nine months, develop into a complete female baby. The problem occurs when cells are instructed by the little chromosomes to make a male baby instead. Because there are only so many cells to go around, the cells necessary to develop a male’s reproductive organs have to come from cells already assigned elsewhere in the female. Recent tests have shown that these cells are removed from the communications…
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“It’s happened,” cried the bishop in anguish as he sat playing bridge one evening with some charming people. “What’s happened?” asked the young woman next to him. “A stroke! My left side is paralyzed.” “Are you sure?” asked the young lady. “Yes, yes,” groaned the bishop. “I’ve been pinching my left leg for the past few minutes and feel no sensation whatsoever.” “Relax,” said the young lady. “That was MY leg you were pinching!”
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The following was written by State Representative Mitchell Kaye from Cobb County GA: We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid any more riots, keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior and secure the blessings of debt-free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great grandchildren, hereby try one more time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally whiny, guilt-ridden, delusional, and other liberal,…
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This particular set of triplets were still inside their mother. They were having a conversation about what they were going to be when they grow up. The first one said, “I’m going to be an electrician because it’s dark in here!” The second said, “I’m going to be a plumber because I am tired of all this water.” The third said, “I’m going to be a boxer.” The other two asked him,”Why are you going to be a boxer?” He…
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Two boy scouts went on a nature hike in the hills picking hickory nuts. Along the way, they filled their small pails and then started to fill their pockets and shirts. When they could hold no more nuts, they started down the country road until they came across a cemetery. The boys decided that would be a good place to stop and rest and divide out the nuts. The two boys sat in the shade of a large oak tree…
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It was supposed to be a happy time, but it wasn’t. Santa was really angry. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the Christmas cookies. The Elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had put in while making toys, and the reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. They had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and crashed it into a…
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A team of archaeologists were working when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A dog 2. A donkey 3. A shovel 4. A fish 5. A Star of David They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least more than three thousand years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists…
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Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town’s morals recently accused George, a local man, of being an alcoholic because she saw his pickup truck parked outside the town’s only bar. George stared at her for a moment, and said nothing. Later that evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left it there all night.
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Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying: “DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!” posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register. He asked the store manager, “Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” “Yep, that’s him,” he replied. The stranger couldn’t help but be amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you…
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