Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
KEEP HONKING WHILE I RE-LOAD TAXATION WITH REPRESENTATION ISN’T MUCH BETTER MY WIFE SAYS I DON’T LISTEN TO HER. I THINK THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID. YOUR KID MAY BE AN HONOR STUDENT BUT YOU’RE STILL AN IDIOT IF YOU CAN READ THIS, I CAN HIT MY BRAKES AND SUE YOU. IS A GRUNTLED EMPLOYEE THE OPPOSITE OF A DISGRUNTLED EMPLOYEE? WHEN SIGN-PAINTERS GO ON STRIKE, WHO PAINTS THEIR PICKET SIGNS? WHAT ARE PREPARATIONS A THRU G? WHY ARE THERE BRAILLE…
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Two guys sat down for lunch in the office cafeteria. “Hey, whatever happened to Pete in payroll?” one asked. “He got this hare brained notion he was going to build a new kind of car,” his coworker replied. “How was he going to do it?” “He took an engine from a Pontiac, tires from a Chevy, seats from a Lincoln, hubcaps from a Caddy and well, you get the idea.” “So what did he end up with?” “Ten years to…
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There was this boy who woke up one night with a nightmare. He cries, “Mummy, Mummy!” His mother came rushing into the bedroom and the boy told her that he had a dream that Grandma died. So a week later, his Grandma died. The boy woke up another night screaming and he told his mother that he dreamt that Grandpa died. Strangely enough, a week later Grandpa died. The boy woke up yet another night screaming that he had a…
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One day Snow White was going upstairs to take a shower and the seven dwarfs decided that they would go outside and stand one on top of each other’s shoulders to build a ladder and look into the window. They told the guy on top to tell them everything that’s happening and they would pass it down the line to the others. Suddenly, the top dwarf whispers, “She’s taking off her shirt..” The other dwarfs repeat, “Taking off her shirt”,…
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The Smiths had tried for years to have a child, and not having had any luck, they decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, “I’m off. The man should be here soon”. Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the bell, hoping to make a sale. “Good morning madam. You don’t know me but I’ve come…
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A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table. The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, “51 days, 51 days, 51 days!” Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows.…
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A french man, an american man and a romanian man are on a plane. The french man sticks out his hand and declares, “We’re above France.” The other two, confused, ask him, “How did you know?” He answers “I stuck out my hand and could feel the top of the Eifel Tower.” The american then sticks out his hand and is sure that they’re flying above America. The french and romanian ask him how he knows. He replies, “I stuck…
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A businessman was feeling rather ill and went to see the Doctor about it. “Well, it must be your diet,”, reported the doctor. “what sort of greens do you eat?” “Well,” the man replies. “I only eat peas. I hate all other green foods”. “Well man, that’s your problem…legume intolerance. Those peas will be clogging up your system, you’ll have to give them up.” “But how long? I mean, I really like peas!” “Forever, I’m afraid,” intoned the doctor. The…
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Did you here about the Jones baby? He was born without any eye lids, so the doctors decided to use the skin from his circimcision to make him eyelids. The operation went great but they said they would have to wait a couple of weeks to see if was going to be cock-eyed.
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Here are some film phrases to help you in your film viewing. Classic- A really boring movie that no-one likes. Ten Best- The 10 worst movies. (Usually Classics) Landmark- A really, REALLY boring movie. (Like 2001) New-Wave- The directors a lunatic, and no-one can make head or tail of the movie. Review- A biased analysis of a movie made by people who care about things like plot, theme and acting; things that have nothing to do with the enjoyment of…
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