Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A secretary, a paralegal and a partner in a city law firm are walking through a park on their way to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, “I only grant three wishes, so I’ll give each of you just one.” “Me first! Me first!” says the secretary. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the…
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This young man was going golfing one day, but he wasn’t very good. He had been hitting the ball in the rough, the water, and soon a sand trap. By the time he hit the sand trap he was very annoyed. So he stood there swinging at the ball but missing and in the process digging a hole. Soon he hit something hard (not the golf ball). He bent over and dug it up to see what it was. When…
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Two natural gas company service personnel, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of an alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. When they finished, the senior supervisor, proud of his physical condition, challenged his younger co-worker to a foot race…
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SO BIG Yo mama’s so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step. Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she can’t wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back. Yo mama’s so big, she rollerskates on busses. Yo mama’s so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. Yo mama’s so big, she uses bowling…
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A joy of which I’ll not partake Is eating children’s birthday cake. To “blow out” candles, in a word, Is really patently absurd: Each puff contains sufficient moisture To propagate your av’rage oyster. So, Birthday-Boy and ditto-Daughter, Withhold from me your whiff of water. I do not need some little squirt To atomize on my dessert. Among the things I will not do Is have my cake and drink it, too.
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A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a house. A kid, about 12 years old, answers the door. He’s wearing a pink tutu, has a cigar in one hand, and a martini in the other. The salesman is a little taken aback, so he asks, “Excuse me son, are your parents home?” The kid takes a big puff on the cigar and answers, “What the f*ck do you think?”
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Old cowboy Sam suddenly found all of his cows were very sick. An immediate call to the vet resulted in the recommendation for a cure involving the insertion of a rather large pill in the rear of each animal. After several rather difficult tries, another call to the vet resulted in the use of a blow pipe. With the pill in the blow pipe and a hard puff the pill was immediately lodged in the proper location. With the large…
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Did you hear that they caught the Lone Ranger? They took off his mask, put him up on a horse, and then put a noose around his neck. Before they hanged him, they asked him if he had any last requests… He said “yes” and that he would like a big cigar to smoke! Well, they gave him one and he began to smoke and puff, and puff and smoke. Just then one of the cowboys from the back of…
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There were three dead men. One was an Italian, one was a millonaire, and one was gay. God told them they could have a second chance in life, if they could stay away from the things they love the most for one day. The guys said ok. “PUFF”– they were alive again. They were walking and all of a sudden the Italian guy smells Italian food, so goes ands eats the food. “PUFF” — he’s gone. Well the gay guy…
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A Boston man sits on his living room couch watching the American League Championship Series between the Boston Red Sox and the New York Yankees. In comes his wife, huffing and puffing, and stands in front of the television screen. At that exact moment, Red Sox shortstop, Nomar Garciaparra, hits a two-run homer. “Stan!” she yelled. “I think you love the Red Sox more than you love me.” “You know what?” the said, full of rage. “Right now I love…
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