You The Man!
Two gays were sitting on the edge of the bed, one turns to the other…”YOU the man!” Second gay responds, “NO, You the MAN.” First gay says, “No, No, you don’t understand, You are THE man!”
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Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Jokes News
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One man Jokes - page 15
Be Honest! What Do You Think Of Me?
A young friend of Albert Einstein’s proudly presented his eighteen-month-old son to the great scientist. The child looked up into the old man’s smiling face and promptly began to howl. Einstein patted him on the head and said fondly, “You’re the first person for years who has told me what you really think of me.”
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The Executive, The Bartender and The Cellphone
A high level executive sits at a local bar one night and orders a drink. Out of the corner of his eye, the bartender notices the man speaking in to the palm of his hand, as if he were giving orders to a secretary. “Who were you talking to?” the bartender asks the executive, thinking the man was having a breakdown. The executive stretches out his left hand and shows the bartender a cellphone keyboard encrusted into his left hand.…
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Dear Abby’s Better Ones
Dear Abby: I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much, I’m not even sure this baby I’m carrying is his! Dear Abby: I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again. Dear Abby: My boyfriend is going to be twenty years old next month. I’d like to give him something nice for his birthday. What do you think…
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Birds and Cones
Little Johnny was sitting in the class, Miss Jones asked him, “If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one, how many are left?” “None”, Johnny replies. The teacher, astonished, asked Johnny to explain “Well,” Little Johnny replies, “The sound of the gunshot will scare the other birds and they will fly away.” The teacher responded, “The correct answer is 4, but I appreciate your way of matured thinking, maybe you are right”. Little Johnny then…
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How many body builders…
How many body builders does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but a lot of his friends to tell him how good he looks doing it.
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Why are men…
Why are men like lawn mowers? If you’re not pushing one around, then you’re riding it. Why is a hard man good to find? You don’t have to stay up half the night massaging his ego. How is an ex-husband like an inflamed appendix? It caused you a lot of pain, and after it was removed you found out you didn’t need it anyway. What do men and pantyhose have in common? They either cling, run or don’t fit right…
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Chickens in a basket
One day two Polish men were walking down the road. One man had a basket with chickens in it. At that time he said to the other man, “If you can guess how many chickens are in this basket I’ll give you one of them.” So the other man says “No, I want two chickens.” So the man with the chickens says, “I’ll tell you what if you can guess how many chickens are in this basket I’ll give you…
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Hot Dog
Two foreign men take a trip to the US. During the trip one man says to the other “I hear they eat dogs in this country, maybe we should eat some dogs too so we can fit in” So the two men walk up to a hot dog stand and order two hot dogs. When they recieve them, the first man opens his up, looks inside, and says to his freind “what part did you get!”
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Ultimate Fantasy
Ask any man, and he will tell you that any woman’s ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking; the other, cleaning.
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