Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Angelina and Giuseppi were standing before the judge in divorce court. Angelina says: “Your Honor, we beena marry 25 years ana Giuseppi he’s always picka his nose ana when we maka love, he’s a never letsa me on top. I just canna taka dis no more.” The judge listens solemnly, then addresses Giuseppi. “Giuseppi, isa dis true? You always a picka your nose, and you never let Angelina on top? What you gotta say fora yourself, eh?” Giuseppa says, “Well,…
(0)
Loading...
Your girlfriend is the centerfold in playboy, your son is on the wheaties box, and your wife is on the milk carton.
(0)Loading...
In the back woods of Kentucky, the redneck’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to be a lantern and said, “Here, you hold this high so I can see what I’m doing.” Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. “Whoa there,” said the doctor. “Don’t be in a rush to put the lantern down…I…
(0)Loading...
10. I think of you as a brother.(You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in ‘Deliverance.’) 9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. (I don’t want to do my dad.) 8. I’m not attracted to you in ‘that’ way. (You are the ugliest dork I’ve ever laid eyes on.) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don’t want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I’m…
(1)Loading...
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Warning: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, but that’s the only time I have to work on my hair.) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?) On…
(2)Loading...
After enlisting in the 82nd Airborne Division, I eagerly asked my Recruiter what I could expect from jump school. “Well,” he said, “it’s three weeks long.” “What else?” I asked. “The first week, they separate the men from the boys,” he said. “The second week, they separate the men from the fools.” “And the third week?” I asked. “The third week, the fools jump.”
(1)Loading...
Two 8-year-old kids, 1 boy and 1 girl, decided to see which was faster in a race. They decided to run a best of three series to see who was faster. In the first race the boy won, and in the second race the boy won. “Why are boys so much faster than girls?” The girl asked. “I don’t know, let me ask my dad.” The boy replied. He went inside to ask his dad and his dad told him.…
(0)Loading...
After dinner, dancing, and a moonlit stroll under the moon, a young man and his highly experienced date retire to his apartment for some extra-curricular activities. The action is hot, and soon both find themselves naked in his bed. Suddenly, the woman starts laughing uncontrollably at the sight of his little penis, and asks her new boyfriend, “Who do you plan on pleasing with that little thing?” Without missing a beat the young man replies, “Me!”
(0)Loading...
An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silverwalls which could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, “What is this, Father?” The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, “Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life; I don’t know what it is.” While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady…
(0)Loading...
INNER SKELETON A 63 year old widow was admitted to hospital in Recife, Brazil, suffering abdominal pains. X-rays showed that she was carrying a 20 inch long skeleton of a fetus which she conceived a decade earlier. It had become lodged outside the womb and was never expelled from her body. FEMALE SOFA A 500 lb. woman from Illinois was examined in the hospital. During the examination, an asthma inhaler fell from under her armpit, a dime was found under…
(0)Loading...