Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Lil’ Johnny on Politics Lil’ Johnny goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?” Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you The People. The nanny- well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we’ll call him The…
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Lil’ Johnny’s teacher decided that she’d test her students’ knowledge on holidays. She went through Christmas and Easter and all of those. So far all of them were doing well. The last one left was Independence Day. She figured he couldn’t make that a sick answer. So, she called on him. This is what happened…. “What about Independence Day, Johnny?” asked his teacher. “In-deep-end-dance Day is about celebrating anniversaries of past sex lifes. The term In-deep-end-dance is self-explanatory….”
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Q: Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, the perfect woman & the perfect man all stop at the same time at an intersection. Who goes first? A: -The perfect woman. The other three don’t exist.
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One morning little Johnny comes walking down the stairs to find his breakfast not on the table. He looks over at his mother and says “Hey mom, where is my breakfast?” His mother looks at him and says “Well, you won’t get your breakfast until you finish your chores.” Johnny walks out of the house and heads down to the barn to do his chores. He goes in an gets the chicken feed and walks into the pens. All the…
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A Sunday School teacher asked, “Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?” “No,” replied Johnny. “How could he with just two worms?”
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A resident in a seaside hotel breakfast room called the head waiter to his table. “I want two boiled eggs, one of them so undercooked it’s runny, and the other so overcooked, it’s tough and hard to eat. Also, give me some grilled bacon that has been left on the plate to get cold; burnt toast that crumbles away as soon as you touch it with a knife; butter straight from the deep freeze so that it’s impossible to spread;…
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In a classroom one day the teacher asked her students, for homework, to think of a true story that has a moral. So the next day she asked Wendy to come up first. The teacher says, “Alright Wendy, what’s your story?” “Well,” Wendy started,”My grandfather lives on a farm and he has chickens. He wanted to sell all the eggs at the market but they didn’t make it to the market because the back of the truck broke and they…
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One time I saw an old lady trip and fall in the street. I know it shouldn’t have been funny, but I laughed anyway. But then I started to think, “What if I was an ant?” Then it wouldn’t be so funny.
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The teacher asked who in the class could define the word “indifferent.” Little Johnny raised his hand and said, “That’s easy, it means it feels so good.” The teacher asked how he came up with that definition, and Johnny said, “I was up in my room last night, and my sister and her boyfriend were down on the porch, and I heard her say, ‘That feels so good’ and her boyfriend said, ‘That’s cause it’s in different.’”
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‘Twas the night before Christmas, Old Santa was pissed, He cussed out the elves, And threw down his list, “Miserable little pricks, Ungrateful little jerks, I have good mind, To scrap the whole works! I’ve busted my ass, For damn near a year, Instead of ‘Thanks Santa,’ What do I hear? The old lady bitches, ‘Cause I work late at night, The elves want more money, The reindeer all fight. Rudolph got drunk, And goosed all the maids, Donner is…
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