Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
ONE- Foreplay is not a privilege; it is a birthright. TWO- If you take her out to a fancy restaurant, don’t try to subtly steer her away from the lobster, Diamond Jim. THREE- Quit blowing smoke up women’s asses about the sanctity and power they possess as life-givers and come up with some decent affordable child care. That way, maybe poor single mothers can go to work and get off welfare, and we won’t have to listen to any more…
(0)
Loading...
One night there were two drunks lying in a ditch, and one had his finger up the other one’s butt. A police officer was driving by and stopped when he saw them. “What are you doing with your finger up his butt?” the policeman asked. The drunk man said, “My friend is sick and I’m trying to make him puke…” The cop said, “You can’t make him puke like that!” The drunk replied, “Like hell I can’t… just wait until…
(0)Loading...
Three sisters decided to get married on the same day to save their parents the expense of separate weddings. As a further step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home. Later that night, their mother couldn’t sleep, so she went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. On her way, she tiptoed by her oldest daughter’s bedroom and heard her screaming. The mother thought to herself, “That’s normal, especially on…
(0)Loading...
1. If I like it, it’s mine. 2. If it’s in my mouth, it’s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it’s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it’s mine. 5. If it’s mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way. 6. If I’m chewing somethin up, all the pieces are mine, too. 7. If it just looks like mine, then it is mine! 8. If I saw it first, it’s…
(0)Loading...
Just recently I was honored to be selected as an Outstanding Famous Celebrity in my community to be a judge at a chili cookoff because no one else wanted to do it. Also, the original person called in sick at the last minute and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy,…
(1)Loading...
Every “Hormone Hostage” knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. Here are helpful hints: DANGEROUS: What’s for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT? SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown. SAFEST: Wow! Look at you! DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER:…
(0)Loading...
A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. “I’m so ashamed, Doctor,” she said. “I guess I’ve let myself go.” The physician was checking her eyes and ears. “Don’t feel ashamed, Miss. You don’t look that bad.” “Do you really think so, Doctor?” she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, “Of course. Not…
(0)Loading...
A famed English explorer was invited to Dartmouth to tell of his adventures in the African jungle. “Can you imagine,” he demanded, “people so primitive that they love to eat the embyro of certain birds and slices from the belly of certain animals? They grind up grass seed, make it into a paste, burn it over a fire, then smear it with a greasy mess they extract from the mammary fluid of certain other animals?” When the students looked startled…
(0)Loading...
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell — she’s got a grenade in her mouth!
(0)Loading...
Parents are embarrassing, Take my dad. Every time a friend comes to stay the night, he does something that makes my face go red. Now don’t get me wrong. He is a terrific dad. I love him but sometimes I think he will never grow up. He loves playing practical jokes. This behavior first started one night when Anna came to sleep over. Unknown to me, dad sneaks into my room and puts Doona, our cat, on the spare bed.…
(3)Loading...