Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF STAR WARS WAS SET IN GLASGOW? Chewbacca would look roughly the same except he’d only be about 5ft tall, from Blackhill and called Shug. He’d have the same amount of body hair but would also have tattoos, would permanently smell of drink and invariably sport a Rangers top. Obi-Wan Kenobi would invariably be referred to as Chief or Big Yin by his cohorts. People trying to start a fight with him would addess him as Wanky-Nobby.…
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The Raiders Al Davis had finally put together the perfect Raiders team for ?98. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn?t find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a Super bowl win. Then one night, watching CNN, he saw a war zone in Bosnia. In the background, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a young Bosnian soldier with a truly…
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When three-year-old Jimmy first saw Mom nursing his newborn baby sister, he asked, “What are you doing?” Mom replied, “Giving your little sister her milk.” Jimmy then asked, “What’s in the other one? Juice?”
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An elderly man was walking along the beach in miamI while his wife slept late at their hotel. He came upon a bottle with a cork. He pulled the cork and lo and behold, out came an enormous genie. “Hello, genie”, said Morris. “I will grant you one wish,” said the genie, “and if I can’t grant that wish, I will grant you another one.” “Ok” said Morris. He picked up a shell and drew a map in the sand.…
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One day little Johnny came home from school and saw that a new house was being built down the block. His mom told him he could go watch if he promised to be very careful and stay out of the way. When he got back, he was very excited and told his mom he learned something new. “Take one end of this piece of string and go to the other end of the room.” After she did this, he tried…
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One day at Sunday school, the teacher was asking the children where Jesus lives. The teacher called on one of the kids who replied, “Jesus lives in my heart.” “Very good.” said the teacher. She calls on another kid. “Jesus lives in Heaven.” “Very good,” said the teacher. Little Johnny is in the back of the room waving his hand to be called on. The teacher didn’t want to call on Johnny, but does anyway. “Jesus lives in the bathroom,”…
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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her were about 200 women walking in a single file. The woman couldn’t stand the curiosity any longer. She respectfully approached the woman walking the dog…
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1.Your bartender knows you better than your own mom. 2.You have worked 12 different jobs in the last 2 months. 3.Everything you own is in the pawn shop. 4.You have to check the gas and fill the oil in your car. 5.Your last date was on the spice channel.
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A pregnant lady walked into a bank in the middle of a robbery, and was shot three times in the stomach. She was rushed to the hospital and asked if the triplets would be ok the doctor said they will pass the bullet in nine years. Nine years pass and one of the boys came home from school and said, “Mommy, mommy, I shit a bullet!” and she said “That is normal.” Then another boy came out of the bathroom…
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Warning: Some of these facts may have expired. Was written in 1995. Also, this is VERY long, but PLEASE read it all… Q. What was the longest MONOPOLY game ever? A. 70 days Q. How many little green houses have been built since the MONOPOLY game began? A. Approximately 5.1 Billion Q. What is the longest MOMOPOLY game ever played upside down? A. 36 hours Q. What’s the most frequently rolled number with the dice? A. 7 Q. What’s the…
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