Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman, who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy. “Are you the landlord?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. “Actually, no” he replies. “Can you get him for me? I need…
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Two babies were in their cribs, when one baby said to the other, “Are you a little girl or a little boy?” “I don’t know,” replied the other baby giggling. “What do you mean, you don’t know?” said the first baby. “I mean I don’t know how to tell the difference,” was the reply. “Well, I do,” said the first baby chuckling. “I’ll climb into your crib and find out.” He carefully maneuvered himself into the other baby’s crib, then…
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Dear Tech Support: Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Pokernight10.3, Bar Night 2.5, Weekend Golf 6.1 and Football 5.0 no…
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Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes? Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. Room service? Send up a larger room. He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot. I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception. A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. A…
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A man was doing a study of children’s senses in a first grade class using a bowl of lifesavers. He had the children put on a blindfold and identify the flavors. They began..cherry, red in color, lime, green in color, orange, orange in color. Then the man put in some honey flavored lifesavers and asked the children to identify that flavor. The kids couldn’t guess what the flavor was so the man said he would give them a hint. He…
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A Junior High School in Memphis, Tennessee sponsored a luncheon for the residents of a senior citizens home. The principal of the school received the following Thank You note. * * * Dear Reyer School: God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens’ luncheon. I’m 94 years old and live at the Memphis County Home for the Aged. My family has long since passed away and I rarely have visitors. As a result, I…
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A middle-aged woman took her three-year-old granddaughter, Molly, out for ice cream. She asked Molly what she wanted. Molly said, “I want banilla!” The woman said, “Honey, it’s *V*anilla. V–not B.” Molly tried saying it again, but it came out VaBanilla. After some more coaxing, Molly finally said, “Vvvvvanilla!” The woman said, “YES! Now, tell me again–what kind of ice cream do you want?” Molly said, “I think I want chocolate.”
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THINGY (thing-ee) n. female: Any part under a car’s hood. male: The strap fastener on a woman’s bra. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. female: Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another. male: Playing football without a helmet. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner. male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the boys. BUTT (but) n. female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes “look…
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What do you say to a man with two black eyes? Nothing hes already been told twice
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Possible Titles for Lewinsky’s New Book: I Suck At My Job What Really Goes Down In The White House : How I Blew It In Washington You Have to Work Hard to Find the Softer Side of the President Testing the Limits of the Gag Rule Going Back for Gore Secret Services to the President Harass is Not Two Words: The Story of Bill Clinton Deep Inside The Oval Office The Congressional Study on White House Intern Positions She’s Chief…
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