Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
One day Mrs. Flanagan feels sickly and goes to the doctor for a look at. The doctor looks her over and says, “Well now, Mrs. Flanagan, I’m perplexed on your condition but if you bring a urine specimen to me in the morning, I can tell exactly what’s wrong.” Mrs. Flanagan went home and said to her husband, “The doctor wants me to bring him a urine specimen in the morning. I don’t know what a urine specimen is, what…
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A man comes home from work to find his wife in the bedroom, packing her suitcase. “What the hell are you doing?” he asks. “I’m leaving’ you for a better life,” she replies. “Where do you think you’re going?” he asks. “I’m going to Las Vegas,” she answers. “I hear they pay $400 for a blowjob there.” The man thinks for a minute, then gets his suitcase out and starts packing, too. “What the hell are YOU doing?” his wife…
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A visitor from England was running around town yelling, “The meteor is coming! The meteor is coming! Run and hide, NOW!” A police officer stopped him and said, “What the hell are you yelling about?” The British subject explained that he was repeating what he overheard from two other British subjects, both of whom the officer knew. Hearing the explanation, the policeman got very angry. “WHY can’t you folks from England learn to pronounce the letter ‘H’, when you are…
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An escaped convict broke into a house. He tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom and then proceeded to search the rest of the home. As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous wife, bound up on the bed with her shorty nightgown up around her waist, and whispered, “Honey, this guy hasn’t seen a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex…
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1. Home is where you hang your @ 2. The E-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. 3. A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click. 4. You can’t teach a new mouse old clicks. 5. Great groups from little icons grow. 6. Speak softly and carry a cellular phone. 7. C:\is the root of all directories. 8. Don’t put all your hypes in one home page. 9. Pentium wise, pen and paper foolish.…
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An Irishman, an Italian, and a Polish guy are in a bar. They all are talking about how much there lives suck, and how much the bars in their respective home towns are better. Then the Irishman says, “Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there’s a better one. At MacDougal’s, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!” The others agree that sounds like…
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A man went to the store and bought a few eggs for his breakfast but when he got home, he found all the shells empty. He went to the shopkeeper to ask for an explanation. The shopkeeper checked all the eggs in the shop and surprisingly they were all empty too. Perplexed, both of them went to the poultry farm to check where this problem was actually taking place. They found a hen that had just laid an egg, but…
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Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the couch with his head in my lap. I carefully removed his glasses. “You know, Honey,” I said sweetly, “without your glasses, you look like the same handsome, young man I married.” “Honey,” he replied with a grin, “without my glasses, you still look pretty good, too!”
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A guy once had a parrot that had a very dirty mouth. He would bring a date home and the parrot would squawk, “Somebody’s gonna get screwed!” Of course, the girls would get mad and leave. This went on for about 3 or 4 weeks, until finally he got so frustrated that he went back to the pet store where he had purchased the bird. He asked the pet store owner how to stop his parrot from scaring away his…
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A little girl named Teena has a cat named Piddles, and one day Piddles dies. Teena runs to her father with tears in her eyes and says, “DAD PIDDLES IS DEAD!!!” Her dad says, “Oh I’m so sorry that that had to happen.” Tenna sniffs, “Dad, how c-come Piddles legs and arms are sticking up in the air?” The dad having no idea, uses his quick wit and says, “Well, this way when Jesus comes down to get her he…
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