Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A man was called in for an audit by the IRS. So, he asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. “Wear your worst clothing and an old pair of shoes. Let them think you are a pauper,” the accountant replied. Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice: “Don’t let them intimidate you. Wear your best suit and an expensive tie.” Confused, the man went to his Minister, told him of the conflicting…
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Q. What’s the definition of lesbian? A. Just another damn woman trying to do a man’s job
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A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote “this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag.” on the back of a deposit slip. While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that some-one had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street…
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What is a man’s favorite game at the Casino???? Answer: a slut machine
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There was once a man who couldn’t speak. Everyday, he prayed for God to give him a voice. One day God decided to answer the man’s prayers, so He sprayed Holy Water on the man, miraculously giving him the ability to speak. The man’s first words were: “Who the fuck sprayed water on me!”
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A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men, and soon the ship had left port and was steaming out of the channel. The ensign’s efficieny had been remarkable! In fact the deck was abuzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer…
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A bus, making it’s daily trip, stopped to pick up an older lady. The lady was carrying a big duffle back and she had it clutched to herself as if she was trying to protect it. She walked to the back of the bus and sat down. Two younger men saw the dufflebag she was clutching and one of them said, “Excuse me, but what’s in the duffle bag. The lady responded, “IT’S NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!” The man…
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In filling out an application for a factory job, a man was puzzled for a long time over this question: “Person to notify in case of an accident.” Finally, he wrote, “Anybody in sight.”
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A drunk stumbles out of a bar and sees a nun walking down the sidewalk. He goes over and punches her in the face. The nun is shocked, but before she can do anything, he punches her again, and she falls down. He kicks her a few times, and then he picks her up and throws her against a wall. He puts his face right up to hers and says, “Not very fucking tough tonight, are you, Batman?”
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A blonde buys a ticket and wins the lottery. She goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies her ticket number. The blonde says, “I want my $20 million.” The man replied, “No, mam. It doesn’t work that way. We give you a million today and then you’ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years.” The blonde said, “Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it.” Again,…
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