Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
I have always been a critic of Seattle driving, but recently I had a chance to see how others drive in far away countries, such as China. Since then, I have developed a profound respect for how we drive here in the Northwest. Why? What could be so bad about the driving in China? Here is a collection of short observations I have made riding in the Great Country of China. While Driving in China……………………… Traffic signals are (how should…
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Microsoft has announced that Win98 will be released with a suggested retail price of $109US. Inside sources have been able to determine the cost of each of the Win98 “features”: $1 – Disk Defragmenter Optimization Wizard $1 – Windows System Update $1 – System File Checker Utility $1 – Windows Tune-Up Wizard $1 – Dr. Watson Utility $1 – New Backup Utility $1 – New Accessibility Tools $1 – FAT32 $1 – Windows 98 HelpDesk $1 – System Troubleshooter $1…
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10. Playing Santa at the Center for Bladder Control. 9. Operating a band saw after drinking a 12-pack of beer. 8. Attending All-you-can-eat buffet at Taco Bell the night before that big job interview. 7. Licking red-hot projector bulbs. 6. Midnight ocean swims after attending a crack party. 5. Clicking web links labeled “Your Internet Portal To Hell!” 4. Downloading Fran Drescher MP3 files. 3. Slicing tough, frozen bagels with razor-sharp steak knife, not an FDA-approved bagel slicing device with…
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As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be careful!” “Hell,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car, it’s hundreds of them!”
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On his way home from school, Little Johnny always passed by a street corner where a group of prostitutes would be standing around. These streetwalkers would smile and wave their pinkies at Little Johnny while greeting him, “Hello there, cute little boy!” This went on for several days until Little Johnny decided to confront the prostitutes. He asked, “Why do you keep waving your pinkies at me?” The prostitutes laughed out loud and one of them said, “Oh, we were…
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Cindy Crawford, Ivana Trump, and Whoopi Goldberg are on a plane. The Announcement system clicks to life and the voice of the captain rings through the cabin… “Ladies and gentilemen, I am afaraid the plane has just had a major mechanical failure, and is going to crash. There are only enough parachutes for the crew and myself, and we have already used them – – This is a recording.” Everyone on the plane begins to panic! People are yelling and…
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This woman went to the gynecologist, and when asked what was the problem she responded, “Well, whenever I take off my clothes my nipples get hard.” Shocked, the doctor took a deep breath then asked, “Your nipples get hard?” “Yes,” quite innocently came her reply. “Undress so I can check,” replied the still amazed doc. So she undressed, and he got down to the feeling and massaging, trying to reach an answer. After some considerable time the doctor, still looked…
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This guy and girl just got married so they decided to be together. She said, “You must be gentle, I’m still a virgin.” He replies, “How the hell can you still be a virgin if you were married three times before me?” She says, “Well my first husband was a gynocologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. And well, my…
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Yo mama so black she polish her shoes with her bare hands. Yo mama so black when she put lotion on she look like patent leather. Yo mama so black she spits oil. Yo mama so black she poops charcoal. Yo mama so black she looks like a klondike bar. Yo mama so black she was mixed when she was born, her dad black, her mama black as hell. Yo mama so black her nose looks like two tires yo…
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John receives a phone call. “Hello,” he answers. The voice on the other end says, “This is Susan. We met at a party about 3 months ago.” John: “Hmm… Susan? About 3 months ago?” Susan: “Yes, it was at Bill’s house. After the party you took me home. On the way we parked and got into the back seat. You told me I was a good sport.” John: “Oh, yeah! Susan! How are you?” Susan: “I’m pregnant and I’m going…
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