Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A PRETTY GIRL WENT TO CHURCH FOR CONFESION. THE PRIEST ASKED HER, “WHAT IS THE MATTER.” SHE THEN SAID, “MY BOYFRIEND DID SOMETHING BAD TO ME.” THE PASTOR NOW KISSED HER AND SAID. “DID HE DO THIS TO YOU?” SHE SAID, “NO” HE HUGGED HER AND ASKED, “DID HE DO THIS TO YOU?” SHE SAID, “NO.” HE NOW PULLED OFF HER CLOTHES AND ASKED, “DID HE DO THIS TO YOU?” SHE SAID, “NO.” HE NOW MADE LOVE TO HER AND…
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A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labor is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. “I’m afraid I don’t have a husband,” she replies. “OK, do you have a boyfriend?” asks the Midwife. “No, no boyfriend either.” “Do you have a partner then?” “No, I’m unattached; I’ll be having my baby on my own.” After the birth, the midwife again speaks to the young woman. “You have…
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It was early one Saturday morning. A friend of mine called to warn me of a group of Jehovah Witnesses working our neighborhood. I thought it would be funny if I appeared at the door totally nude and holding a beer. I looked out the window and saw a man in a suit, a well-dressed woman and two young girls carrying what looked like a bag. As soon as the doorbell rang, I opened it. Acting very drunk, I asked…
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A young man wished to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart for Christmas, and as they had not been dating very long, he decided a pair of gloves would be appropriate… romantic but not too intimate. Accompanied by his sweetheart’s younger sister, he went to Saks and bought a pair of white gloves. The younger sister purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items, and the sister got the gloves and…
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Tips For Yankees 1.) Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it. 2.) If you forget a Southerner’s name, refer to him (or her) as Bubba. You have a 50% of being right. 3.) Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean we can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows. 4.) If you do run your car in a ditch, don’t panic. Four men…
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RESTROOM SIGNS Friends don’t let friends take home ugly men —Women’s restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE Remember, it’s not, “How high are you?” it’s “Hi, how are you?” —Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. —Men’s Room, Linda’s Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina To do is to be – Descartes To be is to do – Voltaire Do be…
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This gay guy was coming home from the bar one night and couldn’t score. As he was walking home, he saw a drunk bum passed out on a bench. He thought, “Hmm, better than nothing.” So he did his business and left the guy a $5.00 bill. The next morning when the bum woke up he found the $5.00 bill and went to the liquor store and said, “Give me a $5.00 bottle.” The next night the guy and a…
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Your Horoscope AQUARIUS: Jan. 20 ? Feb. 18 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same stupid mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk. PISCES: Feb. 19 ? Mar. 20 You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have a minor influence on your friends and people you resent you for flaunting…
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This guy and his newlywed wife go to the Hilton for their honeymoon night. At the front desk, they check in and the receptionist gives the groom the key to the bridal suite. Just then he says to the groom, “Sir, It is now 6 o’ clock, dinner will be served from 7:30 onwards.” The groom looks at him and says, “Thank you, but we won’t be needing any” and off he and his bride go to the room. The…
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Film actor George Raft, who was noted for portraying sinister gangsters during the 1930’s through the 1950’s, and was notorious for his gangland associations in real life, acquired and disposed of over ten million dollars in the course of his career. Once chided by a friend for his extravagant spending habits, he was asked what he did with his money. “Part of the loot went for gambling,” he explained. “Part went for horses, and part for women. The rest I…
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