Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Take a look at the following words, after their letters have been rearranged: Dormitory = Dirty Room Evangelist = Evil’s Agent Desperation = A Rope Ends It The Morse Code = Here Come Dots Slot Machines = Cash Lost in ’em Animosity = Is No Amity Santa = Satan Mother-in-law = Woman Hitler Snooze Alarms = Alas! No More Z’s! The Public Art Galleries = Large Picture Halls, I Bet A Decimal Point = I’m A Dot in Place The…
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Ten Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them. Rule Three: I am…
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1. The last fight we had was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!” 2. In the beginning God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then neither God nor man has rested. 3. My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog. 4. Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mother-in-laws. 5. Young son: Is it…
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10.Do not say what you mean. Ever. 9. Stash feminine products in their backpacks and in their books as cute reminders that you were thinking of them. 8. Play Alanis Morissette’s “You Outta Know,” loud. Look at them. Smile. 7. Look them in the eye and start laughing. (During an intimate moment) 6. Cry. 5. Gather many female friends and dance to “I Will Survive” while they are present. Sing all the words. Sing to them. Sing loud. 4. Go…
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Discussion between a father and his 12 year old son: Son: Dad, I have to do a report for school. Can I ask you a question? Father: Sure son, whats the question? Son: What is Politics? Father: Well, let’s take our home for example. I am the wage earner, so lets call me capitalism. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the government. We take care of your needs, so lets call you the people.…
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The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was serious and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II – a mere 54 years ago! Obviously, the intent was not to be “funny,” but by today’s standards, this is hilarious! For those of you with efficiency issues, pay attention to #8. ———————————— Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees: There’s no longer any question whether…
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A New York man was forced to take a day off from work to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour after endless hour for his case to be heard. When his name was called late in the afternoon, he stood before the judge, only to hear that court would be adjourned for the next day and he would have to return the next day. “What for?” he snapped at the judge. His…
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The CIA loses track of one of its operatives, and so calls in one of their top spy hunters. The CIA boss says, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he’s somewhere in Ireland. If you think you’ve located him, tell him the code words, ‘The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning.’ If it’s really him, he’ll answer, ‘Yes, and for mist at noon as well.’” So the spy hunter goes to…
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When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American Ambassador to France threw a gala dinner party at the Embassy in his honor. At the dinner table, the Ambassador’s wife was chatting with Madame deGaulle. “Madame,” she began, “Your husband has been such a prominent figure in the world for so long, first as a great General, then as President of the Republic, now as a statesman, what are you most looking forward to in your retirement years?”…
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One day a man named Olaf walks into the office of a headhunter and says, “I WON A DOB!” The headhunter looks up over the top of his glasses and says, “Excuse me?” Once again the man says, “I WON A DOB!” “Oh,” the headhunter says. “You want a job, I see…what is it you do?” The man says, “I’m a Diesel Fitter.” With this the headhunter turns on his laptop and types vigorously to search his computer files in…
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