Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A blonde was cooking in her kitchen one morning and she started a grease fire (big surprise!) so she called 911 (after looking up the number of course). She finally reached the fire department and said, “Help! I have a fire, please come quickly!” The fireman responded, “Ma’am, how do we get there?” The blonde responded, “Big red truck, DUH!”
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A very elderly couple went to see a lawyer. They were ushered gently into the lawyer’s inner office, and sat across the desk from the attorney who was studying the couple’s papers. He looked up after a moment. “How can I help you today, Mr. and Mrs. Watson?” The woman piped up in a thin, reedy voice. “We’ve come to get your help in filing for a divorce.” “A divorce?” The lawyer was stunned. “If you don’t mind my asking,…
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One day Adam & Eve were making love in the Garden of Eden. After they were finished, Adam was relaxing when God came into the garden. He sat beside Adam & they talked for awhile. Adam said, “You know, God, Eve & I just finished making love, and I want to tell you how great it is! I think sex is the best thing you’ve given us!” God replies, “That’s wonderful Adam. I’m glad you like it so much. By…
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Hand written on restroom wall above the urinal: “Why are you looking up here? The joke is in your hand!”
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Jon’s working at the lumbermill, pushing a tree through the buzz saw, and accidentally shears off all ten of his fingers. He goes to the emergency room. The doctor says, “Yuck! Well, give me the fingers, and I’ll see what I can do.” Jon says, “I haven’t got the fingers.” The doctor says, “What do you mean, you haven’t got the fingers? It’s 1998. We’ve got microsurgery and all kinds of incredible techniques. I could have put them back on…
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Three ants, Joe, Bob, and Billy, were living in an ant hill right in the middle of a woman’s yard. They were sleeping peacefully, until they were suddenly awakened by water rushing down and flooding the hill. The three friends barely escaped. Having lost their home, they decided to enter the house and find somewhere to sleep. They walked into the woman’s bedroom, and began talking over their “room” assignments. Joe had decided to sleep in one of the woman’s…
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A friend of mine works in a camera store. The other day a very confused-looking woman approached the counter and handed my friend a camera. She said, “I took pictures, but I forgot to put film in the camera. Can you please get them out of the camera for me?”
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There is a blind man on his way to Texas for the first time. He is on the airplane, and he is in First Class. He goes to his seat, and feels them, they are huge. He asks the stewardess, “Aren’t these seats kinda’ big?” She replies, “Oh, everything’s bigger in Texas.” Then he gets to Texas, and he goes to his room. He walks, and walks and didn’t hit the wall for a few minutes, and he was walking…
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There were 3 babies in a lady’s stomach. One day, they were talking about what they wanted to be when they grew up. The first baby said, “I want to be an plumber when I grow up.” The other two asked why. He said, “Someone has to fix all the leaky pipes in here.” The second baby said, “I want to be an electrician.” The other two started laughing, and asked why. He said, “It’s kinda dark in here. Someone…
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A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. When a strong breeze…
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