Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
A father put his young son to bed every night, and to make sure he said his prayers, the father waited outside the bedroom door and listened. Each night the boy ended his prayers with “God bless mommy, daddy, the dog and the cat.” One day the cat scratched the little boy and that night he finished his prayers, “God bless mommy, daddy and the dog.” The next morning when the family awoke they found the cat dead. A few…
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A man mentioned to his landlord that the tenants in the apartment above his were being a bit unruly. “Many a night they stomp on the floor and shout till around midnight.” When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, “Not really because I usually stay up and practice my trumpet till about that time most every night, anyway.”
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I just heard a story on the radio about a 90-year-old lady who decided that buying Christmas presents for all her family and friends had become a bit much. So she wrote out checks for all of them to put in her Christmas cards. She then wrote out her Christmas cards and put, “Buy your own present” after her name and sent them off. After the Christmas festivities were all over, she found the checks in her desk! Everyone had…
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Types of Farting People The Vain Person One who loves the smell of his own farts. The Amiable Person One who loves the smell of other people’s farts. The Proud Person One who thinks his farts are exceptionable fine. The Shy Person One who releases silent farts then blushes. The Imprudent Person One who boldly farts out loud, and then laughs. The Unfortunate Person One who tries hard to fart, but shits instead. The Scientific Person One who farts frequently,…
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Cohen’s wife Zelda was a real shrew, a nag, a whiner, who made his life a hell on earth. When she died suddenly while screaming at him one morning, he nearly wept with joy. At the funeral, they were carrying her casket to the grave when one of the pallbearers tripped on a big rock, and like dominoes, tripped all the other pallbearers. The casket went careening down the hill where the lid flew open as it crashed into a…
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Three boys went fishing by a stream. One of the boys left and was peeking through some nearby bushes. When the other two boys went to see what he was looking at, the little boy ran. So the two boys looked through the bushes and saw a naked woman swimming. When the two boys caught up to the first and asked why he ran away, he replied, “My mom told me that if I ever saw a naked woman I…
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A very busy corporate lawyer was called out of an important meeting to the bedside of an extremely wealthy widow who was one of the firm’s most prestigious clients. She was also well-known for her devoted Christian faith. The lawyer was ushered into the bedroom of the widow and asked, “What can I do for you, Mrs. Warbucks?” “Just come and stand beside my bed,” she said while lying in bed. The lawyer did as he was told. A few…
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George was sitting at his desk and stressing over the upcoming deadlines when his boss came up to him. Their conversation went as follows: Boss: “George, when is the last time you took a vacation?” George: “Sir, I don’t have time for a vacation. There is way too much work to be done.” Boss: “George, I believe you would be more productive if you took some time to get away from your work and relax for a little bit.” George:…
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Jose lived in San Juan, and all he ever wanted was to see a baseball game in Yankee Stadium. Jose loved baseball; and, most of all, he loved the Yankees. He worked and saved and, at long last, bought a ticket, took a plane; but when he got to Yankee Stadium, it was all sold out. Not a seat was to be had. Jose pleaded so much that he touched the heart of the ticket office people, and they found…
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1. The AOL car would have a TOP speed of 40 MPH yet have a 200 MPH speedometer. 2. The AOL car would come equipped with a NEW and fantastic 8-Track tape player. 3. The car would often refuse to start and owners would just expect this and try again later. 4. The windshield would have an extra dark tint to protect the driver from seeing better cars. 5. AOL would sell the same model car year after year and…
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