Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
God grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. Now that I’m older….here’s what I’ve discovered: 1. I started out with nothing .. I still have most of it. 2. When did my wild oats turn to prunes and All Bran? 3. I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart. 4. Funny, I don’t remember…
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Bill Clinton and Jesse Jackson are sitting side by side as they are waiting for Air Force One to take off. The stewardess comes over and asks solicitously, “Can I get you a drink, Mr. President?” Bill Clinton says cheerfully, “Why sure honey! I’ll have a martini, please. Shaken not stirred. Ha ha ha!” The stewardess smiles back and turns to the Reverend Jackson, “And you, sir? Care for the same?” “I’d rather be given a blowjob by a two-bit…
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A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physcially wrong with him, and then told him, “Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.” “I know,” said the man, “but I can’t. My wife refuses to sleep alone.”
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A man is tired of having to do everything for himself around his house, so one day he goes down to his local pet shop and asks the owner for a pet that can do chores for him. The pet shop owner offers the man a dog, and the man replies, saying “Dogs are dirty animals, what else do you have?” The owner says “What about a cat?” to which the man replies, “Cats are too lazy” The owner then…
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Once upon a time, in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. As a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down, also knocking the snake about quite a bit. “Oh, my,” said the bunny. “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. You see, I’ve been…
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There are two guys playing golf, and they both hit their balls way into the rough. They agree to go find their balls and meet on the fairway later. The first guy is pretty sure he hit his into the big patch of buttercups, so he goes over and starts beating the hell out of the buttercups with his club looking for his ball. All of a sudden, an angel comes down from heaven and tells him that he can…
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Mr Starr: I am Starr. Starr I are. I’m a brilliant barri-star. I’m here to ask, as you’ll soon see, Did you grope Miss Lew-in-sky? Did you grope her in your house? Did you grope beneath her blouse? Did she give you gifts and ties? And were you spied by prying eyes? Mr Clinton: I did not do that here or there! I did not do that anywhere! I did not do that in a chair! I went not near…
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A golfer became so mad that he threw his brand new set of golf clubs into the lake. A few minutes later he came back, waded into the lake and retrieved his clubs. He proceeded to take his car keys out of the bag — then threw the clubs back into the water.
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If you receive and e-mail with a subject line of “Armageddon”, delete it immediately without ever reading it. This is the most dangerous e-mail virus the earth has ever seen. It will re-write your hard drive in Braille. Not only that, but it will scramble any disks that are even close to your computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator’s coolness setting so all your ice cream melts and low-fat milk curdles. It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit…
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The nurse was walking down the hospital corridor when her supervisor spotted her. The supervisor couldn’t believe it. The nurse’s hair was unkempt, her dress wrinkled, and to top off her overall dishevelment, one of her breasts was hanging out of the open front of her uniform! “Miss Jennings! How can you account for parading around the hospital not only looking like a derelict, but with your breast exposed?” the supervisor yelled. “Oh that,” said the nurse, as she stuffed…
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