Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
Laugh for Fun - Funny, Blonde, Dirty, Women, Yo Mama Jokes
There was this Scottish guy, all dressed up in his kilt etc. sitting in a bar and he was a bit strapped for cash. He was trying to work out how to solve his problem when this guy with a tea towel on his head, a cigar and a moustache came in. He watched the guy order a whole heap of alcohol. Whe the bartender asked him to pay he just said, “Charge it to the Arafat account.” Now after…
(0)
Loading...
A True Remarkable Occurrence: Two gangsters, James Gallo and Joe Conigliaro, set about to murder a stool pigeon, Vinny Ensulo, alias Vinnie Ba Ba, alias Vincent Ennsie. On November 1, 1973 they jumped him on Columbia Street, Brooklyn, and took him for a ride. Gallo pointed a gun at his head from the right, and Conigliaro covered him from the left. The car swerved violently. The two gangsters shot each other. The New York Daily News described the sequel: “Concigliaro,…
(4)Loading...
It was the first day of Grade Three in a new town for Dave. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn’t get past 20. Dave, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home ahd told…
(1)Loading...
There was once this man in heaven, he asked God what a million dollars meant to him. God replied, “A penny.” Then, the man asked what a million years meant to God. God replied, “A second.” Finally the man asked, “Can I have one of your pennies?” And god replied, “Just a second.”
(0)Loading...
“Honey,” said this husband to his wife, “I invited a friend home for supper.” “What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn’t go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don’t feel like cooking a fancy meal!” “I know all that.” “Then why did you invite a friend for supper?” “Because the poor fool’s thinking about getting married.”
(0)Loading...
14. Got to Get You Off of My Wife 13. She Came In Through John’s Fragile Ego 12. She’s a Woman (Who Was a Man) 11. Can’t Buy Me Love (But Can Rent It by the Hour for 300 Big Ones) 10. Polyurethane Pam Anderson 9. Crackbird 8. Lucy In The Sky With Linus 7. Eleanor Furby 6. All You Need is Drugs 5. Nor-Region Woody 4. She Came in Through the White House Window 3. While My Guitar Gently…
(0)Loading...
15. Grunge look makes it tough to tell living from the undead. 14. Nutrasweet or not, fat-free blood tastes like crap. 13. Hard to get a decent puncture with latex on your fangs. 12. Three Words: Daylight Savings Time 11. Can’t enjoy a meal at Burger King without some redneck yelling, “Look Ma! It’s Elvis!” 10. After 45 years of Communist rule, it’s impossible to find clean, uncontaminated Transylvanian soil for bottom of coffin. 9. After 100 years of trying,…
(0)Loading...
How do you get rid of constipation ? Sit on a block of cheese and eat a mouse.
(0)Loading...
Things Learned from Children For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning. For those who have not yet had children, think of this as birth control. 1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house, 4 inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3.…
(0)Loading...
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because he knew men would never ask directions. 9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV remote because men don’t want to see what’s on television, they want to see WHAT ELSE is on television. 8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when the seat wore out and therefore would need Eve to get one for…
(0)Loading...